Everything's Different
by winchesterdream
Summary: Relationships are hard, especially the love triangle between Bella, Jacob and Edward. Rated M to be on the safe side.
1. Changes

**Nothing belongs to me sadly :( **

**CHANGE**

**EPOV  
**

I looked around, everything seemed dull, like someone had dimmed the lights, though i knew that this was not the case, it also struck me that it was unusually quiet, deathly quiet actually, the low buzzing that i had listened to for the last 90 odd years was gone.

The gentleman in front of me stepped forward, disappointment etched onto his pale face, it also stained his voice,

"I have ordered the guard to let you leave Volterra unhindered, but if you were to return, I cannot guarantee your safety"

I turned to leave, but paused and looked over my shoulder,

"Thank you Aro, you are the only one who can possibly understand my decision, once again, I thank you from the bottom of my heart"

Aro looked at me wistfully and spoke quietly

"I only hope that you don't live" he paused meaningfully, " to regret your decision"

I looked into his eyes trying to decide how he meant his parting words to be construed, I could see nothing in his face and hear nothing of his thoughts.

"hhmmmm, this could get frustrating" I pondered.

As I left the building, I reveled in all the long forgotten sensations that I now felt, and as I pushed open the heavy door and stepped into the sunlight, feeling it's radiance shine down on me I thought,

"It's great to be human again"

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**Please review, this is my first attempt at fanfic, so i need all the help, advice and constructive criticism i can get. **

**A/N The first three chapters are sort of an intro into the story, that's why they are so short, and i can't guarantee regular updates, I'm a pretty busy person, but the more reviews (good or otherwise) will encourage me to update more often!  
**


	2. At Last

**You know the drill, nothing belongs to me :( **

**AT LAST**

**JPOV  
**

The wind rushed over my body as i fell towards the ocean, I took a deep breath at the last moment before my feet broke the surface of the water. I started swimming upwards straight away and as i resurfaced i heard Bella laugh with excitement,

"Can we do that again?" she asked breathlessly, a huge smile across her face.

"One more and that's it!" I called over, "It's starting to get cold and I'm not looking after you when you catch pneumonia" I joked.

I helped her to the beach, then flung her across my broad back. It was much easier if I carried her back up the trail to the cliff top. If I left her to walk herself, it would take too long, not to mention the fact that she would probably fall off the thin ledges anyway. I chuckled, her clumsiness was so endearing.

"What are you laughing at?" she asked,

"Just remembering the look on your face when you saw the other guys cliff diving for the first time"

"Oh" she said blushing.

"Well it _did _look like they were trying to kill themselves" she said defensively,

I chuckled again "and here we are throwing ourselves off cliffs"

We'd reached the top and I kept hold of her hand tight as I put her down on the ground, she was still very likely to fall.

"Let's jump together this time" she said smiling at me and squeezing my hand.

I felt butterflies in my stomach as i looked into her impossibly brown eyes,

_"Settle down Jacob, she's still hurting, don't push it", _I thought to myself. Bella was my best friend, but I ached for more than that. Even when she found out my secret of being a werewolf she still came every day to visit, I had been so afraid that I would lose her at that point, I should have known better, this girl had been around the supernatural long enough not to bat an eyelid.

I cringed at the thought of her life before we had become so close,

_"I hope he's happy wherever he is", _I thought angrily.

The person in question was Edward Cullen, Bella's ex. He has broken her heart, but at least I was here to pick up the pieces. She was a zombie the first time she had come to visit, but slowly and surely time had begun to heal her wounds, but I would put no pressure on her to take our friendship any further until she was ready.

Sometimes I still saw the way she wrapped her arms around her torso when we went anywhere near the places her and Edward had gone together, and how, if anyone mentioned the Cullens, her lips tightened and turned white.

Yes, she was still hurting.

"Come on slow coach" she teased, pulling me towards the edge, "I'm so glad I have you Jacob" she said as she moved closer.

We bent our knees and as i shouted "NOW" we launched ourselves into the air, I felt her squeeze my hand as our feet left the clifftop behind us, i turned my head and she was looking directly into my eyes with such an exultant look on her face, I couldn't look away.

i felt the cool water fold around us as we landed in the surf, her hand still in mine. I pulled her with me back up to the surface and took a grateful breath. I let go of her hand as we swam towards the rocks.

"Race you" I called as i took off,

"No fair!" she cried from behind me, "how am i supposed to compete with a werewolf?" she asked exasperated.

I was sitting on the rocks waiting patiently as she finally dragged herself out of the water,

"That's not cool Jacob" she pouted, but her eyes were friendly.

I just laughed.

She sat by me and snuggled in under my arm,

"You were right, it is getting cold"

"Good thing you have your own personal space heater" i chuckled as I put my arm around her slender shoulders.

I'm not sure how long we sat there with each other, it was as if she were sitting contemplating the whole world. That was the great thing about Bella, it was just so _easy _being with her, our relationship needed no effort whatsoever. I closed my eyes and listened to the sound of the waves crashing onto the beach.

"Jacob" she whispered,

I opened my eyes and looked down at her

"You ready to go home?" I asked shifting my weight ready to get up.

"Shhhh" she said quietly and put her index finger to my lips, she moved form beside me to be kneeling directly opposite.

I froze, as her face moved closer to my own, Only snapping out of my daze when her lips touched mine, her hand finding it's way up to the back of my neck.

I couldn't resist, I put both my hands up and cupped her face, pressing my lips harder against hers, she pulled back, seemingly gasping for breath,

"I can't imagine where I'd be without you Jacob Black" she mumbled leaing in to kiss me again.

There was only one thought running through my mind as she kissed me again,

"_At last" _

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**Please review!! I'm begging you! I need all the help I can get!!**


	3. Decisions

**Normal drill, I don't own anything, well except for my pride :D**

**Decisions**

**BPOV**

We sat there on the rocks, silent, as the sky grew darker, I could feel the wind blowing my hair around my face, pushing spray off the waves towards us, but i didn't feel the cold. Once again my knight in shining armour was protecting me, his strong bronzed arms keeping me nice and warm and safe.

I thought about all that he had done for me, if it wasn't for Jacob I could very well still be a zombie right now, useless to everyone, including myself.

I contemplated the last few months, yes, the pain and heartbreak was still there, but now it was in the background, just a quiet ache, sometimes I completely forgot about it, until something caught me by surprise, like yesterday.

I was in the library, waiting to check out my books, I was standing at the counter and the phone was ringing, Mrs Allen, the librarian went over to pick it up, calling to the young assistant,

"Edward, can you help Bella with her books please, while I grab this call"

I had froze on the spot, unable to answer the young man standing in front of me,

"Miss?" he asked, looking concerned,

"Uh, thanks" I mumbled as i grabbed my books and ran out the door, nearly hyperventilating with grief as i jumped in my truck.

But times like that were getting fewer and farther between, Thankfully.

And it was mainly thanks to my best friend sitting beside me keeping me warm.

My Jacob. He was my sun, always shining, warming me, protecting me, saving me.

At first it was purely selfish reasons that drove me to visit him daily, he made me forget about Edward and the gaping hole that he had left in my chest were my heart should have been. But i found I loved being with him for other reasons, he made me laugh,and reminded me that i was human. He was infinitely patient and he could tell when i was having a bad day and went out of his way to ease my suffering.

When he disappeared from my life for a week I realised how much i had come to rely on him, and there was no way I was going to lose him too. I know this sounds selfish, but i knew he felt the same way about me, actually I think he feels a _lot _stronger feelings than me, so when he refused to see me, I knew something must have been seriously wrong.

So, to cut a long story short, I confronted him, after much arguing and contemplation, I found out he was a werewolf. I'm sure most people would run for the hills at such a thought, but not me, my first thought was

_"My poor Jacob, what can i do for him"_

It was my turn then to comfort him through his hard times.

That was two weeks ago, and if anything it had bonded us together more. Any time i wasn't at school I was with Jacob. He brought out a new side of me, the adventurous Bella. He has taught me to ride motorcycles, taken me hiking through he forest near his home (something i thought i would _never_ do) and we had just been cliff diving.

It was probably very reckless of me, considering how coordinately challenged i was, but with Jacob by my side I always felt safe. He never rushed me and he always picked me up when i fell, emotionally and physically, and basically followed up with a smart alec response about my ineptitude.

I knew how he felt about me, he'd never said it out loud, but I could see it in his eyes and feel it through his skin when he held my hand, I'd never encouraged him and he had never pushed, he knew i was still in pain.

But sitting here now, with him, I wondered,

_"why fight it?"_

I wasn't sure if it was the adrenaline still pumping through my veins or the fact we were sitting here arms wrapped around each other like there was no one else in the world, bt all of a sudden i made a decision.

"Jacob?" I said, my voice barely louder than a whisper,

He opened his eyes and looked down at me,

"you ready to go home?" He asked, making movements to get up,

"Shhhhh" I said, putting my finger against his warm lips. I wanted to do this before he said something that would make me change my mind.

I lent in, I could smell the salt on his skin from our swim. I gingerly pressed my lips against his, they tasted salty too, I lingered a second, to gauge his reaction, seeing if he wanted this,

I needn't have worried.

I brought my hand up to grasp the back of his neck, this seemed to break him out of his stupor. His hands reached up and he placed them gently on either side of my face, pulling my lips harder against his. He was forceful, but still gentle, kissing me back like there was no tomorrow.

It took my breath away.

I pulled away, breathing heavily, and looked into his deep brown eyes, they were alive with happiness and emotion.

"I can't imagine where I'd be without you Jake" I said trying to put into words the way i felt about him.

I leaned in again and kissed him, and all the pain and heartache i had felt in the last few months jus loated away, replaced with happiness and hope.

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**Once again, please review! The real story starts from now! So i better get writing! LOL **


	4. Surprise

**I don't own Twilight or the characters, wish i did thought :D**

**SURPRISE**

**BPOV**

My shoulder joint popped as I stretched, I had been sitting still far too long, this was the last time I let Jacob pick the movie. Of course he picked the four hour long fantasy sci-fi flick. Although I had to admit, apart from the dodgy special effects, it was that bad.

Jacob and I had officially been a couple now for approximately six months, six wonderful months, I might add. And no one had been surprised at all, especially not my father. His satisfied smirk said it all when Jacob and I told him,

"Knew this was going to happen"

He was ecstatic of course, he loved Jacob and was best friends with his father, Billy, who was also unsurprised at our new relationship status,

"Well it's not like you could spend anymore time here Bella" he had said.

Even Jacob's friends, or more correctly, pack, were happy. He didn't even need to tell them, thanks to the handy werewolf telepathy thing, they knew straight away. Paul was the only one who complained,

"Dude, I'm already dreaming about her when I sleep thanks to you, now it's just gonna get worse".

The only person who seemed to mind was Mike. I think he may have got his hopes up when Edward had left. He and Jessica hadn't lasted and he seemed keen to resurrect his golden retriever persona with me. Mike was a nice guy and a great friend, but I just didn't think of him that way, and besides I would never do that to Jessica, I don't think that she would be the best person to get on the wrong side of.

As I pushed myself out of the uncomfortable cinema seat, I looked over to Jacob, who hadn't moved. I couldn't believe it, he had fallen asleep!. He dragged me to this never ending film and then had the nerve to fall asleep whilst I endured the convoluted story lines. I playfully slapped his cheek.

"Wakey wakey eggs and bakey" I yelled in his ear,

"WHAT" he cried, jumping up like a bomb had gone off under his seat,

"I'm very disappointed in you Jacob Black" I said in my best annoyed mother voice.

"Oh crap, did I fall asleep?" he managed to get out through an enormous yawn.

"The least you can do is stay awake if you are going to invite me to the movies" I pointed out as we worked our way out the door amongst the crowd.

"Sorry babe, I ran the boundaries last night with Sam, he thought he caught a scent, turns out it was just an old trail" he explained.

"You should have told me" I scolded "we could have done this another time, I wouldn't have minded you know"

"I know, but I asked you out and you don't want to hang around my place and watch me sleep" he looked genuinely sorry for falling asleep.

"Well I guess I should congratulate you anyway" I said stifling a giggle,

He looked confused, "what for?"

"Well, you must have slept through at least three hours of that film and you didn't snore once, that must have been some sort fo record for you"

"Ha ha" he replied dryly "you think you're _sooo_ funny, lets see how funny you think this is" he said whilst grabbing me around the waist and slinging me over his shoulder,

"Me Tarzan, You Jane" he said in his best caveman voice as we crossed the foyer,

"AAAAYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAA" he yelled louder still, giving his Tarzan impersonation his all.

He put me down on the footpath next to where I had parked my truck, I could feel how red my face was.

"Do you get a kick out of embarrassing me like that?" I asked slapping every part of his body i could reach.

"Hey hey, hold up there" he laughed grabbing my wrists. He was too strong, there was no way I could break free.

"Don't dish out what you can't take babe" he said in a low voice, while holding my arms above my head. He leaned down and kissed me gently.

"Is it safe to let you go know?" he asked eying me suspiciously,

"Of course" I answered "I know you can't help it if you're so immature" I added in my most superior tone.

He laughed and let go off my wrists, lent down and kissed me again,

"But that's why you love me" he chuckled

"Yeah, yeah" I rolled my eyes at him.

We hopped in my truck and I turned the heat up, it was a typical afternoon in Forks, cloudy, dark and a light mist was falling from the sky.

We drove home holding hands, and as I pulled up outside my house, I noticed another car parked in the drive,

"Looks like Sue's here again" I commented

"Yeah, I think I heard Billy mention that Charlie invited him and Sue over to watch the game this afternoon, I think they might be staying for dinner too"

I sighed, "he might have told _me_ this, since i'll be the one cooking for everyone"

I already had steaks in the fridge, but now enough for everyone, and we were running low on vegetables too.

"I'm going to have to do a run to the grocery store, if i am going to feed everyone" I said putting the truck into reverse.

"ah Bella?" Jacob said uneasily, "I really wanted to watch the game too, if that's okay" he added quickly,

"Fine" I said and stopped to let him out of the truck, "just let Charlie know I've gone to the store to get supplies for dinner, okay?" I said.

"Sure, you're the best Bella" he said leaning over the seat to peck me on the cheek,

"I know" I replied modestly.

I drove the short distance to the store, pre occupied with what i needed for dinner,

_"More steak, potatoes, more salad things, i might do some garlic bread, and maybe chocolate pudding for dessert" _

I parked the truck as close as I could to the entrance, not wanting to walk across the whole car park in the worsening rain, I stopped for a second at the entrance,

_"Basket or trolley?" _ I thought as my mental shopping list grew longer,

"Trolley" I mumbled to myself as i grabbed the nearest one and pushed it through the one way barrier.

I took my time, picking out the nicest looking pieces of meat, and the freshest looking lettuce. They were watching the game anyway, they wouldn't even miss me.

The trolley was slowly filling up as i wound my way around the supermarket. I looked through the groceries, making sure I had everything, before I headed to the checkout.

"Damn" I said under my breath as I realised that I had forgotten the garlic. I looked up at the signs hanging from the roof listing what was in each aisle, and found the one i was looking for,

_Herbs and Spices_

I wheeled the trolley in the right direction and stopped in front of the shelves covered with lots of little jars, I scanned the shelving for the one I was after,

"Great" it was on the very top shelf, just out of my reach. I stretched up standing on my tippy toes, I was still about two inches short.

I felt a stranger lean over me and saw a hand garb the jar of garlic,

"Here, let me get that for you"

I stopped breathing, that voice was so familiar, but at the same time, it wasn't.

I was still standing on my toes and as i went to turn I over balanced and fell towards the shelves, smacking my forehead on the closest one,

"Ow" I exclaimed, rubbing my head, I looked own at my fingers, at least I wasn't bleeding.

I heard a low chuckle behind me. Once again i started, it didn't sound how it used to, it was wrong somehow.

I slowly turned, and found myself looking into the greenest eyes I had ever seen.

"Nice to see your still the same old clumsy Bella" he said.

"Edward?" I asked, unsure of what I was seeing, "Is that you?" I could feel my heart constricting.

"It's nice to see you again Bella" Edward said, I couldn't take my eyes away from his,

"How............what.............where............your eyes................you look............different" I was having trouble with coherency.

He looked at me seemingly amused,

"I'm back, I kept my promise to you" he said simply.

"What?" I was still having trouble forming a sentence, my brain wasn't keeping up at all.

"I promised I would always do what was best for you, to keep you safe" he explained "I found a way to be with you and still keep you safe" his face was suddenly serious.

I was just confused.

"I'm human again Bella"

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**Review time people!! NOW!!! Sorry, just me being pushy! LOL **


	5. Damn

**Once again I don't own anything! **

**DAMN**

**BPOV**

_"I'm human again Bella"_

It felt like all the blood was draining from my body, I opened my mouth to speak, but I couldn't force the words out of my mouth, everything was losing clarity, fading...............................

"Bella?, Bella?, can you hear me?" the concern clear in his voice, I realised now why it sounded different.

"Edward" I croaked out. I opened my eyes and blinked at the bright fluorescent lights shining down on me, I was laying on a cold tiled floor, I'd fainted.

"Oh, thank god" I heard a deep guttural voice say, I looked over, it was the store manager, relief etched all over his ruddy face. I don't think he liked the idea of someone lying unconscious on the floor of his store. I lifted myself up to lean on my elbows,

"I'm sorry" I said, looking at the large man hovering over me, I didn't have the courage to look over at Edward.

I felt a soft hand grab my arm,

"Here, let me help you up" the voice had lost none of it's musical cadence, it was, however, not as velvety as it once was, but that didn't stop it from being damn sexy though. As Edward helped me to my feet, I kept my eyes down, I was uber aware of the feel of his soft warm skin against my own, I had to admit it was a strange sensation.

"She's fine now, thank you for your assistance, I'll make sure she gets home safely" Edward said to the manager, he walked away with a look on his face that clearly said,

_"Why me?" _

I guess he had to fill in paperwork now because of my little episode.

"Are you okay Bella?" Edward asked,

"I think so" I replied, my eyes still downcast, "I have to pay for these and get home, everyone will be wondering where I am" I said quickly, pulling away from him. I just needed to get my groceries and get out of here, and away form Edward, it would be better that way.

I grabbed the handle of the trolley and pushed, headed straight for the emo girl behind the nearest checkout.

"I'm sorry Bella" I heard him say softly, I couldn't hear any footsteps to indicate that he was following me, but that didn't mean that he wasn't. I pushed the trolley into the checkout and began to unload my groceries, the girl behind the counter looked at me like I was a freak. Of course I had just collapsed in a heap on the floor. Then again, she was the one standing there with her jet black hair in pigtails, skin made deathly pale with makeup and every visible inch of skim covered in tattoos.

As I put the last of my purchases up I chanced a look down the aisle, Edward had gone, and as much as i hated to admit it, this upset me. Yes, a small part of me did want me to follow me, talk to me, touch me again.

_NO _ I told myself _those are the exact thoughts that you should NOT be having_

I carried my bags out to the truck, focusing on breathing in and out and one foot in front of the other, this was all that was safe for the moment.

I drove home slowly, concentrating hard on the road ahead, the weather had continued to deteriorate, it was now an out and out deluge.

I pulled up outside our house and pressed the horn, I knew Jacob would come out to help with the bags, at the thought of Jacob I felt my heart skip a beat.

_feeling guilty much? _I thought wryly _deep breaths Bella, you've done nothing wrong._

I tried to calm myself as I watched Jacob take long strides across the lawn, as I looked at him grinning to see me home, I made my decision,

_I wasn't going to tell him anything_

I know this may seem dishonest and wrong, but there was no way that I would inflict any pain on Jacob, I could just see his face if I told him,

_"hey Jacob, I ran into Edward today, he found a way to become human again and decided to drop by and say hi"_

_"Great, why don't we invite him over for dinner?" _

Yeah, like that was going to happen!

I leaned forward and rested my head on the steering wheel,

"what the hell am I supposed to do?" I asked myself. I was snapped out of my self loathing by a loud banging on the side of my truck,

"Hey, you gonna sit in there all day? or are you going to come in and rustle up us men some food?", he wore his big happy Jacob smile as usual, it momentarily chased away my misery,

"I don't think Sue would like to hear you calling her a man" I warned. Fortunately, I was able to make it inside the house without falling and losing half the groceries in the mud. I put the groceries on the counter gratefully when I got inside and called out,

"Dinner won't be far away guys"

"No problem Bells, games got about half an hour left" my dad called back.

Jacob started to help empty everything out of the bags,

"So, how come you were gone so long?, didn't lock yourself in the cool room by accident or something did you?" he asked with a giggle,

_Shit, what do I say? what do I say?_ my heart sped up, I had to come up with something good, and I had to make it believable,

"I ran into Angela, and we just got talking, totally lost track of time, you know how it is" I said quickly, trying not to sound to guilty,

"Oh, cool, and how's she going?" he seemed to have bought it,

"Great, she was just grabbing some treats for the twins, she is babysitting tonight,letting her parents have a romantic night out" wow, this lying thing was getting easier by the second.

"Now, unless you plan on cooking or cleaning, you'd better get out of the kitchen" I said, playfully slapping him on the chest. I wanted him out before he could notice the guilt I felt etched onto my face.

"Yeah, yeah, don't worry I'm going" he said, backing up, his hands in the air in a surrendering gesture. I set about getting dinner ready, I had to concentrate or risk losing a finger or burning off a good few layers of skin.

As I put the potatoes and garlic bread in the oven and tossed the salad I thought about what had happened today, about how one innocent trip to the supermarket had suddenly made my life a whole lot more complicated. But, it didn't have to be, if I just got Edward out of my mind, got on with my life with Jacob, everything could go back to normal. But who was i kidding?, getting Edward out my head, like that was going to happen, not now I knew he was back in Forks, and human.

Dinner passed in a rush of loud conversation, laughs and the scraping of cutlery on plates,

"That was great Bells, you're a gem" said my dad, giving me one of his special crinkly eyed smiles,

"Yeah, thanks Bella, that was a lovely meal" Sue added, gathering up the plates, "Jacob, I think since Bella provided such a lovely repast, the least you and I could do is clean up" she said, throwing him a dish towel.

I followed Charlie and Bill into the living room and made myself comfy on the couch, Charlie flicked it over onto some random sitcom. I tried to concentrate whilst listening to Sue and Jacob arguing over who was going to wash and who was going to wipe.

The sitcom was mildly amusing in a brain numbing kind of way, Jacob came and settled in beside me, wrapping his arm around my shoulders, he gave me a small squeeze and a little wink out of the corner of his eye, my dad saw this and just rolled his eyes. Billy yawned,

"We better think about heading home, or Jake here will be a zombie at school tomorrow, and he'll learn even less than usual"

"HEY!, I'm not doing that bad" he said defensively,

"Only because Bella helps you with your homework every night" he retorted.

Sue helped Billy into the hallway and Jacob pulled me up off the couch with his arm still clamped around my shoulders. He held my chin between his forefinger and thumb and kissed me gently,

"Love you" he cooed,

"I'll see you tomorrow okay" I replied, he just looked into my eyes and smiled, I know exactly what he was thinking,

_Why won't she say it?_

Even though Jacob and I had been dating for six months and had been friends longer, I had never said 'I love you'. He had never asked why and we had never had that awkward silence while he waited for me to return the sentiment like some tragic romance movie. I'm not even sure why I couldn't say the words, it wasn't as if I didn't care about him deeply, I did, but some some reason my subconscious just wouldn't ,let the words out of my mouth.

He gave me another quick peck on the cheek before he stepped out the front door, I stood on the top step waving until Sue's car turned around the corner. I turned and closed the door turning the latch, having a police chief as a father had made me very safety aware. Charlie was standing in the living room doorway,

"You were very quiet tonight, everything okay?", he did look concerned,

"Yeah, I'm fine, just a bit tired. Jake and I went to the movies today, it always makes me tired" I yawned "I'm going to head straight to bed, I'm beat" I added

"I climbed the stairs, grabbed my toiletries and headed to the bathroom, hoping a long hot shower might relax me. It did, to a degree. After drying off and putting on my favourite old sweats I climbed into bed. The rain had lightened and now beat a soft symphony on the roof, it now calmed me, unlike the first few weeks in Forks, it had stopped me sleeping then, now I was unable to sleep without the soft pitter patter overhead. I flicked off the bedside lamp and settle back into the pillows, and all the thoughts I had been fighting all evening rushed through my head.

Those green eyes, that voice, his warm soft hands on my arm

_"I'm human again Bella"_

I closed my eyes and tried to recite scenes from Romeo and Juliet, it was a surefire way to get myself to sleep. I felt myself ease into unconsciousness. The dream I slipped into surprised me.

It was a rare sunny day on the Washington Peninsula, Jacob and I had hiked to a small secluded beach in the Queilute reservation, we had packed a blanket, our bathers and some food and drinks, planing a full day swimming, picnic and maybe a quick stop at the rock pools on the way home. We were laying on the large blanket in the sun, drying after swimming in the small bay. I was laying on my side tracing my fingers across his chest,

"You are an amazing creature Jacob Black" I complimented, he rolled onto his side and looked me up and down,

"You're not so bad yourself Miss Swan" he said with a glint in his eye. He leaned forward and kissed me deeply and slowly ran his hand down my arm onto my waist, drawing me closer. I wrapped my arm around his waist, his skin was hot against mine.

I'm not sure what got into me at that point, but everything just felt right, I shifted my weight so that he was rolled onto his back with me on top of him, I moved my lips from his mouth and planted small kisses all the way down to his collarbone, then further still down his chest, he grabbed my upper arms and lifted me so he was looking at my face,

"Bella? what are you doing?" he asked, the strain clear in his voice,

"Exactly what you think I'm doing" I replied, surprised at the husky tone in my voice.

I pushed myself back down and pressed my mouth hard against his, he let out a soft groan,

"Damn" he muttered around my lips. I could feel his hardness growing and I knew at that point exactly what i wanted..........................him.

I grabbed his left hand and placed it on my breast,

"This is not the time to be shy Jacob" I felt him start to massage it through my bikini top,

"That feels great Jacob" I breathed, he brought his other hand around to grab my butt, I let out a sigh. He deftly rolled me over onto my back, careful not to press his full weight on me,

"Are you sure?" he asked,

_Ever the gentleman _I thought to myself

"Positive" I said. He moved his hands down either side of my waist, I lifted my hips so it was easier for him to remove my bikini bottoms, I could feel his hot breath on my skin, it raised goosebumps. He stood up to remove his own shorts and I blushed and looked away as he threw them onto the sand. He leaned over me gently and put soft delicate kisses down my neck. I could feel his hardness pressing against my thigh, I spread my legs slightly to grant him better access. He pushed himself inside of me and I gasped,

"Did I hurt you?" he asked anxiously,

"no, it feels good" I murmured back. He was slow and gentle rubbing his hands and lips all over my body the whole time, I could feel a stirring between my thighs and moaned,

"Jacob" I wrapped my legs around his hips, drawing him deeper,

"Damn" he growled, and suddenly he was increasing the speed of his thrusts, I increased my own and felt the most amazing release,

"GOD!" Jacob exclaimed as he reached his own climax. He rolled off me breathing heavily,

"Thank you Bella, I love you" he said with amazing sincerity. I opened my eyes to look over at him, but what I saw snapped me out of my dream like a rude slap to the face.

It was Edward.

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**Hope y'all liked that chapter, I thought I would make Jacob and Bella's relationship a sexual one to show how serious they are about each other**.

**Please review, it encourages me to write more :)**

**I might not be able to update for a while now, I have a lot on for the next week, but I have some annual leave coming up so should be able to squeeze a few more chapters out then :D  
**


	6. Deadline

**I don't own Twilight, etc etc etc. :D Please forgive the errors, I'm on annual leave and have earned the right to be lazy!  
**

**DEADLINE**

My eyes snapped open, and my breath came out in short sharp gasps.

_This is not good_, I thought to myself. How can I dream about the cementing of Jacob and my relationship and still have Edward pop up? What was I going to do?

I sat up and wiped the light sheen of sweat off my forehead, the sky was just beginning to lighten. I decided I needed to clear my head, and the best way to do that was go for a quick walk through the forest next to my fathers house. This was something I would never have contemplated before Jacob had taken me bush walking, even though I was still clumsy, at least there was a path through the woods, no roots or fallen branches trying to trip me up every five steps. I threw on my favourite lightweight cargo's and long sleeved shirt, it wasn't raining so I left my jacket hanging on its hook in the hall.

I stepped out into the fresh air, breathing in the deep earthy smell, funny to think how much I hated this place when I first moved back, now it really was my home and I couldn't imagine being anywhere else. I set my iPod to shuffle and headed towards the tree line. The soothing sounds of Mozart's symphony no.5 filled my ears, classical always has such a calming effect on me, maybe because it was what my mother used to play when I was younger to settle me down. I entered the forest and let my feet fall one in front of the other as I let the sounds of the piano occupy my mind. I had been walking for about half an hour when I decided to turn back, today was a school day after all, and as tempting as ditching sounded I knew I didn't have the guts to do it.

Opening the front door I heard Charlie pottering around in the kitchen, and the smell of burnt toast assaulted my nostrils,

"Need some help with breakfast dad?" I called, as I walked in the kitchen the smoke rising from the grill made my eyes sting,

"I had it turned on high" he said sheepishly, "it's okay I decided on cereal the second time around" he said pointing to the empty bowl on the counter, "see, I can feed myself you know"

"Barely" I said, opening the window to try and clear the smoke.

"You go for a walk this morning?" he asked while pouring two glasses of orange juice,

"Yeah, woke up early and couldn't get back to sleep, so I decided to get some fresh air" I grabbed a glass of juice and gulped it down fast, "I better get ready for school, or I'll be late" I said, heading up stairs,

"Well I'm off to work, not sure what time I'll be home so don't worry if I'm not home til late" Charlie called,

"Be safe Dad" I yelled down to him,

"Always am" I heard him say as he headed out the door, a couple of seconds later I heard the cruiser pull out of the drive. I had a quick shower and quickly got dresses for school, the usual jeans and sweater combination. I grabbed my bag off the floor next to my desk and was just about to head out of the door when I realised I had forgotten my phone, picking it up off the bedside table, I noticed the little envelope flashing in the corner of the screen, indicating messages, after typing in my password it appeared i had missed _a lot _of messages, six in fact,

_Must be Jacob, _I thought flicking through them. Three of them were indeed from Jacob, two last night and one this morning,

_Hey babe, just wanted to apologise for falling asleep today at the movies, I promise to make it up to you next time _:)

The second,

_Night babe, sweet dreams, mine will be because I will be dreaming of you 3_

and the last from this morning,

_Did you get my messages last night? have a great day at school, will see you this afternoon 3_

The next three messages were from a number I didn't recognise,

_Maybe Jessica got a new number, she was talking about how she thought she had talked her parents into getting her an iPhone,_

my curiosity was peaked, I bet it was Jessica, texting to brag about her cool new phone and all the things she could do on it, that was so like her, and it was only ever her Jacob or Angela that texted me,

_Bella, I am exceptionally sorry about startling you in the store yesterday, I had no intention of surprising you like that, it wasn't fair to you and I apologise deeply. I had intended on inviting you out for a nice dinner to explain everything and hopefully take up where we had left off. I understand my re-appearance might be a lot to take considering the circumstances I left in, but rest assured I only did it to protect you, not because I didn't love you anymore, no matter what I said._

My breath was stuck in my chest, so much for getting Edward out of my mind. A thousand things were running through my mind, how did he get my number?, how did he become human again?, but one part of that message overrode everything else,

_hopefully take up where we had left off_

My fingers were frozen on my phone, terrified to open the next message,

_Just delete them Bella, you don't need this._

**_Don't you want to read more about how he still feels for you._**

I felt like one of those cartoons, where the character has two little doppelgangers on their shoulders, one an angel and one a devil, fighting over what to do next.

"Its only a text message, what can it hurt?"I said to myself, taking a deep breath and pushing the button, what I read made me wish I hadn't,

_Bella, I need you to understand why I left, and why I did it, I would also love to explain how my current situation came about, it cost me an awful lot, but I did it for you, which means it was worth it. I will leave the decision up to you whether you would like to see me again or not, I will understand if you don't, the way I hurt you was inexcusable, but I did it out of love. You have my number now, I await your reply.I love you Bella, I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me._

Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap.

I stood there frozen, like a stunned statue, my mind blank, it was too dangerous to think right now. The postman pulling up at the letterbox snapped me out of my daze,

"SHIT!" I cried, looking over at the clock, I was late, very late, my first class had already started and I wasn't there. I must have been standing here for at least forty minutes, there was no way I could cope at school today, so I dropped my bag and decided when Charlie came home I would tell him I felt sick and took the day off. I did feel sick, right to the pit of my stomach. As I sat down on the edge of my desk I notice out of the corner of my eye, the little photo frame Jacob had given me after we had first started dating, it was a photo of the two of us hanging out at the beach at La Push, he gave one to me and kept another one beside his bed,

"So we always think about each other" he had said, it was a cute gesture at the time, now it just made me feel extraordinarily guilty, I felt the urge to turn it around so I wasn't looking at it, and that thought made me feel even guiltier. Jacob was my boyfriend, he loved me and treated me like a princess, I couldn't imagine not having him in my life, and here I was ditching school because my ex was sending me text messages about how he still loved me and wanted to catch up, it wasn't just that that was making me feel guilty, it was the fact that I was actually considering texting back that upset me.

I stared at the phone, there was still one unread message there, I was scared to open it, terrified might be a better word. What more could he possibly have to say, hadn't he already screwed with my mind enough?. I opened the message,

_Okay, so you haven't messaged me back, I was sort of hoping you would straight away, maybe that means you don't want to meet me, maybe you've moved on with your life, maybe you've met someone else, I knew I shouldn't have left, or maybe you just haven't read it yet, This is driving me mad. I'm sorry, a drawback of being mortal again is the impatience. I really really want to talk to you Bella, if I haven't heard from you in 48 hours I will leave Forks and never bother you again. I sincerely hope to hear from you soon. xxx _

Apparently he hadn't screwed with my mind enough. I should just text back and say I have a boyfriend, I'm sorry for any inconvenience I've caused, I'm getting on with my life, but part of me wanted to know what he meant by becoming human had cost him an awful lot, and maybe I should give him the chance to explain, maybe I could get some sort of closure, lord knows I probably needed it, and didn't he deserve to hear it from me in person? wouldn't that be fairer?.

_Now you're just making up excuses to go meet him, you know that's a bad idea, how would Jacob feel?. _

_**Go on just do it, there's nothing wrong with meeting up with an old friend, Jacob doesn't need to know, it's completely innocent.** _

Great, now the angel and devil were back.

I looked at the times the messages had been sent, there had been only twenty minutes between the second and third messages, wow, he really was impatient. Well, I had 48 hours to decide, but I didn't need it, I wasn't going to meet him, it would be wrong and unfair to Jacob, Edward had made the decision to leave and now he needed to live with that.

_But he did it for you, _my subconscious told me,

"I don't care" I said. Great, now I was talking to myself, that's just one step away from madness. It shouldn't be this hard, I looked over at the photo of Jacob and I, arms wrapped around each other, smiling like we didn't have a care in the world. He was everything I needed, warm , safe, secure and loving. So why couldn't I get Edward Cullen out of my head?

**_Because you still love him._**

This thought struck me like a brick wall. No, I love Jacob, he was my priority now.

_Then why can't you tell him that? Why are you dreaming about Edward? Why can't you just delete those messages and forget you ever got them? _

I picked up my phone and started to type. I had made my decision.

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**Hmmmm, not sure about this chapter, but I do have some good ideas about where this story is headed *evil grin* **

**So please read and review and if you have any ideas or suggestions please feel free to let me know!  
**


	7. Guilt

**You've all heard it before, Twilight is not mine, the characters are not mine, no matter how much I wish they were. **

**GUILT**

_I'm having the day off school, Charlie is at work, would you like to come over? _

I hit the send button, and let out a huge sigh.

"That's that" I said to myself, "you made your decision, now to go through with it". Strangely enough I did feel better, making the decision is the hard part, once it's made, following through is easy enough, well, in most cases anyway.

I figured I should do the responsible thing and text Charlie to let him know I wasn't at school, they would call him soon enough anyway,

_Dad, I wasn't feeling well and have stayed home from school, don't panic if they call._

Send. I headed downstairs to wait for my visitor and grab something to settle my nerves, I decided a glass of water and some crackers would be best, probably the only thing I could keep down in my current state. As I sat at my usual place at the table I heard my phone beep, my heart started pounding,

_You okay? want me to come home? _

Thank god it was just Charlie, I know he worries about me, but sometimes I wonder whether he realises that I am an adult now, and he doesn't need to look after me,

_No, I think it's just a 24hr tummy bug, I'll be fine, don't stress, don't hurry home, I'm fine. _

The last thing I need is for him to come home and find me healthy (well, mostly) and not alone, that would go down like a lead balloon. I put my glass in the sink and wiped up the crumbs that the crackers had left on the table,

_What is taking him so long_, Seems like I have an issue with my patience now too, I thought to myself dryly.

I decided to wait in the lounge, who knows how long he would be and at least it would be more comfortable. Turning the television on I flicked through the channels, great, infomercials on every channel, no wonder housewives get so bored. I picked the one with the cheesiest looking presenter and hoped laughing at his feeble attempt to sell me the newest greatest invention ever would distract me from my impending doom. As he tried to explain how his little device would make my life so much easier I heard a knock at the door, it startled me and I nearly knocked over the lamp beside me in my haste to get off the couch. With my hand on the door knob I took a deep breath,

_You can do this Bella Swan. _

Putting on my best smile I pulled the door open, and there standing in front of me, was the reason I still knew how to smile. Jacob. I threw myself into his arms and gave him a huge squeeze,

"Wow, really missed me last night huh?" He asked giving me a quick kiss, "I sure missed you"

"I was a bit tired this morning and decided that my intellect could survive one day away from school, and figured what better way to spend my free time than with my amazing boyfriend. I hope you don't mind?" I asked,

"Of course not, to tell the truth I've been terribly lonely during the day since school finished" Jacob attended the school on the reservation and they finished two weeks before Forks High. He grabbed my hand and pulled me inside,

"So what are we planning to do today? Bikes? Hiking? Cliff diving? Movie? I promise I won't fall asleep this time"

"Well I thought we could just hang out here together today, take it easy, I told Charlie that I was sick so I figure going out in public is a pretty bad idea"

_And I'm scared I might run into Edward Cullen again._

"Sounds good to me, anything on TV?" he asked plonking himself down on the couch, grabbing the remote control.

"Infomercials, really riveting stuff" I replied sarcastically "There are some dvd's I got the other night from the video store there, I haven't watched the horror yet" walking over to the cabinet I looked over at Jacob, he looked so happy and I had no doubt that there was nowhere else in the world he would rather be right now, I felt a knot of guilt tighten in my stomach,

_How can you do this to him, don't you think he deserves to know?_

I winced, stupid conscience, just shut up already. I pulled out the dvd and threw it at the enormous guy on my couch,

"Look okay?" I asked, it had a pretty girl on the cover and a guy in a mask covered in blood, just his type of movie.

"Looks great, this actress is so hot" he said "but nowhere near as hot as you" he added, his russet coloured skin darkening,

"flattery will get you everywhere" I threw back, winking.

"Thats what I'm hoping" he said hopping up to put the dvd on "You got any munchies?" he asked, damn this boy could eat, I'm not sure there would be enough food in the cupboards to satisfy his appetite. I walked into the kitchen and opened the pantry doors, luckily there was a huge bag of Doritos at the back, I pulled them out and closed the doors, as I turned I noticed my phone still on the counter top, I picked it up and turned it off, I didn't expect him to message again, but who can guess what the new impatient Edward might do, with my phone off my mind eased a little, but not the ball of guilt still lodged in my stomach.

"All yours greedy guts" I laughed throwing him the bag, I settled myself in beside him and he put his arm around my shoulders drawing my closer, I could smell his skin, earthy and warm, I took a deep breath breathing him in, it was nice being with him like this, easy and carefree, his overheated skin against mine, I was lucky to have him, I wasn't going to jeopardise this.

We watched the movie in silence, jumping when the bad guy jumped out of the shadows with an axe, laughing at the dodgy acting of the 'hot' actress, after the bad guy had been killed, the hero kissed his girl and the credits had rolled I looked up at Jacob to see that he was staring directly at me,

"You really do have the most beautiful eyes Bells" he said softly, lifting his hand up to brush my hair from my face,

_Just like Edward used to._

I reached up and kissed him hard on the mouth,

_See conscience, I love Jacob! _

I wound my hand in his long hair, moving my mouth against his with more urgency, I knew exactly how to get Edward out of my head. Jacob pulled his head back.

"Charlie?" he asked, his voice low and husky,

"Won't be home til late" I replied planting small kisses down his neck, I lifted my face to be level with his,

"Jacob, I love you" I said looking into his dark eyes, the look on his face said it all, complete exultation and desire, he scooped me up in his arms and carried my towards the stairs,

"You have no idea how long I have waited for you to say that" he said softly as he bowed his head down to kiss me, it was soft, slow, and full of emotion.

We lay there spent afterwards, catching our breaths, wrapped around one another, our clothes littered around the floor, blankets bundled at the foot of the bed. We didn't get a lot of chances to be together like this, and the times we did were nice, but this time it had been.....................intense. Whatever my words had done to Jacob, I liked it.

"I love you Bella Swan" Jacob whispered into my ear, kissing me along my jawline,

"I love you too Jacob Black" I murmured back.

We were snapped out of our bliss by an urgent beeping,

"Damn, thats my phone" Jacob growled, rolling over to retrieve it out of his discarded jeans. I marveled at his muscles as they rippled down his back, running my fingers gently along up spine, I heard him sigh as I traced the lines across his shoulders and back down his ribs,

"You have the most amazing touch you know?" he said pressing away at his phone, "Crap, it's my dad, Harry Clearwater's had a heart attack, he needs me to take him to the hospital" I felt his back tense under my fingertips,

"Oh my god, is he okay" I asked sitting up, Harry was a very close friend of both Charlie and Billy, and so was his wife Sue,

"It doesn't say, I better go and get Dad, he'll be pretty anxious" Jacob jumped up and began to collect his clothes from various points around the room, "I'm really sorry I can't stay, this afternoon was amazing" he said pulling his shirt over his head,

"That's okay, I understand, give Sue my love and tell Harry I hope he gets better soon" I said sitting on the edge of the bed, Jacob leaned over and kissed the edge of my mouth, I put my hand up behind his neck and pulled him closer,

"I do really wish I could stay, and that is not helping" he admonished, pulling away, "I'll message and let you know how Harry is, I love you" he leaned in and pecked me on the cheek, turning quickly he was out of the door before I could say another word, worry etched onto his smooth brown face.

I decided I better get cleaned up and think about something for dinner, I'm sure the neighbours could hear my stomach rumble from next door. I picked up all the clothes from the floor and threw them in the laundry basket, picked up my blankets and threw them back on my bed, I grabbed my toiletries bag and some clean clothes and headed into the bathroom for a quick shower.

After making myself presentable again, I went down to the kitchen and looked through the fridge to see what I could cook up, there was some chicken in the freezer so I decided on fried chicken and salad, as I pulled what I needed out of the pantry and placed it all the counter, I noticed my phone still sitting there, turned off, I quickly turned it back on to see if Jacob had messaged with news about Harry. I had one message, opening the inbox I was surprised to see it wasn't from Jacob,

_9 hours down, 38 to go, I hope this means you are thinking it through, not ignoring me, that would break my heart. I'm sorry for annoying you like this but you are all I can think about. I love you. _

I slammed the phone down on the counter, so this was how it was going to be then, for the next 38 hours he was going to message me until I gave in and responded.

_He can't stop thinking about you, just like the way you can't stop thinking about him._

I **can** stop thinking about him, I **will** stop thinking about him. I made a huge commitment today in finally telling Jacob that I loved him, followed by the most amazing sex we had ever had, I felt like our relationship had turned a corner, like it had grown even stronger, the look on Jacob's face when I had said those words flickered through my memory, like he was the happiest man on the face of the planet at that moment.

I felt the knot of guilt grow bigger, would I have told Jacob that I loved him if Edward hadn't returned? Was it just a knee jerk reaction? Was I really telling Jacob that I loved him or was I trying to convince myself that I didn't love Edward anymore.

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**So please read and review, I'm begging you! **

**Will Bella tell Jacob the truth?, Will Edward drive Bella insane via text message?, Will I stop using this stupid voiceover dialect? Those answers and more next time in Everything's Different :D  
**


	8. Perceptive

**Okay, so I rewrote this chapter about 3 times, and I consumed a whole bottle of wine while writing it, so if it's no good or there are heaps of mistakes, blame the Merlot, not me. :D**

**Same old story, Twilight is not mine, I am not Stephenie Meyer, I only wish I had half her talent.  
**

**Perspective**

I looked at my phone, deciding whether it would be wise to throw it against the wall, probably not, a piece would most likely break off and rebound straight into my eye or something, I settled for pounding the chicken fillets with the meat mallet instead, releasing some of the frustration. As I waited for the pan to heat, I heard my phone start vibrating on the counter, I picked it up apprehensively,

_please be Jacob, please be Jacob,_

It was Jacob, letting me know how Harry Clearwater was,

_It doesn't look to good for Harry, your dad asked me to let you know he is here and will be staying the night to help Sue, I'm going home with Billy, he's pretty shaken up, call you tomorrow, love you xxx_

Oh no, poor Sue, poor Seth and Leah, how must they be feeling right now, I'd only met Harry a few times, but I knew how close my father was to him, this would be a big blow to him if Harry didn't make it. I sat down at the table, I don't know if I could take much more today, everything seemed to be going wrong, it felt like the universe was against me, what on earth had I done to deserve this.

I finished cooking the chicken and placed it on some paper towel to drain, I had lost my appetite so I covered the salad and placed it back in the fridge, I'd put the chicken in there too when it had cooled. Heading upstairs a new thought had occurred to me, life can end at any moment, anytime at all , Harry was proof of that, he wasn't that old and here he was fighting for his life, I wonder if he had done all the things he had planned to do in his life, if he didn't make it would he have any regrets, if I were to die tomorrow (and lets face it, I'm a pretty high risk person with my clumsiness and all) would **I **have any regrets?

Yes I would.

I sat on the edge of the bed, looking at my phone, strange how your whole perspective can change due to one little thing, I had already stewed enough over contacting Edward, if I didn't meet up with him would I stew over it for the rest of my days, no matter how many I had left. I could see myself old, wrinkled on my death bed, my final words, "if only........................". Faced with my own mortality I picked up my phone, it didn't mean I wanted anything to happen, I just needed to know why he left and let him know what it had done to me, and explain how Jacob had been there and put me back together again, this would be closure for me and I'm sure for him too, he could move on with his life just as I had moved on with mine. His mortality made no difference, hell, he might not even be the same Edward I had been so infatuated with, maybe it was the fact that he was a vampire that made him so irresistible at the time. I took a calming breath and started to type,

_I would like to meet up with you, but understand that things have changed, I can't guarantee you will get what you are searching for, but I am willing to hear what you have to say, and I have a few things I need to explain to you myself. I am free tomorrow night after shool we can meet behind the school at 4pm. _

I re read the message again, no way he could get the wrong idea from that, and I chose meeting behind the school at that hour because I knew it would be deserted, no chance of being seen by anyone, the last thing I needed was rumours about me seeing Edward behind Jacobs back, and I wanted to wait until I had spoken to Edward before I let Jacob know that he was back, hopefully he would be long gone from Forks before Jacob found out, I dreaded to think what his reaction would be, most likely a violent overreaction, there may not be a reason now for them to be natural enemies, but I was sure that Jacob would never forgive him for leaving me the the horrible mess that he had. Fortunately I knew Jacob had plans over at the Makah Resevation tomorrow afternoon, so I didn't need to make up any excuses to keep him away. I hit the send button, no taking it back now. I quickly received a message in return, he must have been waiting by his phone,

_Thank you, I will not pressure you, I'm just so glad you agreed to see me, see you at 4. _

I crawled back onto the pillows, looking up at the ceiling, if I'm going to deal with this tomorrow, I'm going to need some serious rest, I hauled myself back up and went to the bathroom to brush my teeth and get changed, after putting on my favourite holey flannels and brushing my teeth I decided I was going to need some help on the sleep front, taking two heavy dose cold and flu tablets I headed back to my room, flicking the light off as I entered, the moon shone lightly through a crack in the curtains and I focused on that as I waited for the drugs to kick in, it was a full moon tonight and there were no clouds blocking its perfect round shape, it cast the room in a silvery glow. I felt my eyes start to droop and my mind haze over and let myself fall into a deep dreamless sleep.

I woke with my alarm blaring out it's usual buzz, there is a lot to be said for unnecessary drug use, I had slept like a baby, no dreams good or bad and I felt extraordinarily rested. I pulled the covers back and put my feet on the cold hardwood floor, moving over to the window I looked out over the yard, Charlies cruiser was nowhere to be seen, I wonder if he came home at all last night. I grabbed my stuff and headed to the shower, weirdly enough I didn't feel the nerves about todays meeting like I thought I would, I knew it had to be done so I would just go ahead and do it, I would listen to his story and I would tell him my own, the most important part being Jacob.

I got ready for school quickly and grabbed my bag from ny bedroom, heading into the kitchen I noticed an extra bowl and mug in the sink, so Charlie had been home, he must have left for work already, or maybe the hospital, I made a mental note to text Jacob and see how Harry was. Putting some pop tarts in the toaster I poured a glass of milk, I was genuinely surprised at how calm I was feeling,

_that's a good sign,_ I thought to myself. Burning my mouth on the pop tarts I wolfed them down as fast as I could, I had to go to the school office before I started class to sign for yesterdays absence. Stepping out the front door, I looked up, a reflex action checking the sky, another cloudy, overcast day in Forks, but at least it wasn't raining, the weather had been unusually mild of late. Climbing into my ancient truck I turned the key, old faithful roared to life, thankfully the neighbours always left earlier than I did so my truck's loud rumble never bothered them.

Pulling into the car park I noticed I was one of the first to school that day, I steered the truck into my usual spot and climbed out, another enthralling day awaits at Forks High. The lady in the office just smiled politely when I entered to sign the register for yesterday,

"we called your father yesterday, he explained you weren't feeling well, I hope your feeling better today" she said in her rapid fire voice,

"yes, much better thank you, must have been just a 24 hour bug" I replied, she was already looking away shuffling papers at her desk, completely uninterested on whether I actually felt better or not. I pushed open the glass door and saw that most of the other students had arrived for the day, I saw Angela and Jessica heading towards their first class and hurried to meet them,

"Hey guys" I said pulling up beside them,

"Hey Bella, you feeling okay? we missed you yesterday" Angela said, genuine concern etched on her face,

"Yeah, you missed an exciting day" Jessica said, rolling her eyes, I laughed,

"yeah, I'm sure, but I feel heaps better today, raring to go" I said, Angela looked at me, I'm sure she saw something else behind my eyes, that girl was amazingly perceptive. We made our way to our first class, history, it was mind numbingly boring, did I really need to learn about the Spanish civil war, I doubt it.

Classes seem to drag endlessly, every second person seemed concerned about my welfare, it wasn't like me to take a day off, and everyone had assumed I was practically dying. I texted Jacob at lunch and inquired about Harry, he was still the same, no improvement but no worse either, at least that was something. Angela approached me as I emptied the trash off my lunch tray,

"You okay? you seem kind of preoccupied today" she asked, can't get anything past this girl,

"Yeah I'm fine, just a friend of the family is in hospital and it doesn't look the best" I replied, well it was the truth, just not all of it,

"oh, I'm sorry, I hope they're okay, if you need to talk just ask" Angela was one of the nicest, most genuine people I had ever met, I'm glad we had become such good friends,

"Thanks, that means a lot to me, but I'm fine" I put my tray on top of the bin and grabbed my bag, gym was next, great, the worst part of my day. I walked slowly over to the gym, this morning had dragged but the afternoon seemed to be flying, I walked in to find the coach wheeling in a white board, looks like it might be a theoretical lesson, I let out a grateful sigh, at least I wasn't going to inflict pain on myself or anyone else this afternoon.

As I watched the coach try and explain the sport of raquet ball to everyone, I allowed my mind to wander, only an hour or so now until I faced Edward. I tried to organise my thoughts, what I wanted to say and how I would break the news of Jacob to him, I wasn't a cold heartless bitch, after the messages he had sent I knew he still had very strong feelings for me, I would need to be gentle and explain things, it was only fair, although he hadn't been when he had left, I was a better person than that and I would be polite in my rejection of him. I was lost deep in my own thoughts when I heard the scraping of chairs, the lesson was over, so was the school day.

I had a few small errands to run before I met up with Edward, so I headed out to my truck, Mike Newton waylaid me halfway across the car park,

"You wanna come to the skate park later Bella?" he asked, a desperate look on his face,

"Sorry Mike I have a heap of errands and stuff I need to do, things I didn't get done yesterday you know?" I said, in truth I only had to post some letters and grab a few things at the store, but he needn't know that.

"That's cool, perhaps some other time" he said looking a little dejected, even though he knew I had a boyfriend he still invited me to every social outing he planned, at least he had persistence.

I quickly drove into downtown Forks and took care of my errands, looking at my watch I realised it was 3.50pm, wow, this afternoon had flown by. I started to get butterflies in my stomach, making me feel slightly nauseous. I drove the Chevy into the last spot of the car park, Edward's Volvo was already there parked near the grassy bank.

After a few quick breaths, I jumped out of the truck,

_It's now or never_, I headed towards the corner of the building and as I rounded it I saw him sitting at the tables waiting, his back to me, it looked like he was tapping his foot impatiently.

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**I was going to drag out her decision a bit longer, but _some_ people just want them to meet up already *pokes* you know who you are!! **

**Please review, I promise to send out cookies to everyone who does! or maybe even Edward Cullens if your really nice! :D**

**Not sure when the next update will be I have a pretty busy schedule for the next week or so, but I promise I'll get to it as soon as I can!  
**


	9. Meeting

**Blah blah Twilight is not mine, Edward is not mine *sobs* **

**You asked for it and here it is............................**

**Meeting**

It took every ounce of self control I had not to turn around and sprint back to my truck, I must have been insane when I agreed to meet him, yes that was it, I was temporarily consumed with grief and that translated into making rash, stupid decisions. He still hadn't turned around, maybe he couldn't hear me coming, the thought made me grin, no more super vampire senses, we might finally be on an even footing. I briefly wondered whether he was still able to read minds, not that he had ever been able to read mine, but what if he had read other peoples in this town, I just prayed none of them thought about Jacob and I. I stopped a couple of metres away from his back,

"Edward" I said, hearing a slight tremble in my own voice, he turned and swung his legs out from under the table and stood, he was still gorgeous, tall, well sculpted, his hair the same strange shade of bronze, tousled and messy, his skin was still pale, but now there was a slightest tinge of pink to his cheeks, but it was his eyes that made my breath catch in my throat, gone were the dark bruise like circles underneath and gone were the liquid topaz irises, replaced with a vivid green, they were unlike any I had ever seen before, clear and almost sparkling.

"Bella, I'm so glad you're came, I thought you might not show up" was that a hint of embarrassment I saw flush on his face?, he seemed to be quite nervous, at least I wasn't the only one. He walked towards me, catching his toe on a bump in the concrete, stumbling the rest of the distance between us, I couldn't suppress a giggle, Edward Cullen had just tripped, and it was this one small thing that really brought it home to me, he _was _human again, no longer the infallible, indestructible vampire, I looked up at him, he seemed so vulnerable right now,

"I guess I can no longer pick or your clumsiness, it seems I have been afflicted with the same problem" there it was again, the faint flush of pink in his cheeks, "I can only hope you find it as endearing in me as I in you?" he hesitated, only for a brief moment before taking another step forward, he opened his arms and wrapped them gently around me, I put my hands up to his chest and pushed him away,

"Edward, I just came to talk, please, lets sit down" I gestured back to the picnic table, I looked back up at his face, it was crestfallen, I almost felt sorry for him. We both moved over to the table, I moved around to the other side and sat down opposite him, I folded my hands in front of myself, he mirrored my action, after a moment of awkward silence I cleared my throat and spoke, it came out in a jumble of words,

"I'mseeingsomeone"

"Of course you are, I had no right to think that you would be here waiting for me, I apologise for the assumption I made in my message yesterday, I was just so happy to see you again in the store, I let my emotions get the better of me, I also apologise for scaring you, I'm sure it was quite a shock" he spoke quietly, his eyes filled with sadness,

"May I ask who?, please don't say Mike Newton" I snorted,

"Hell no!, his name is Jacob Black, his dad is good friends with Charlie, they're from the reservation" I wondered if he would make the connection between the name Black and the reservation, of course he had met Jacob's great grandfather, making a treaty with the Quileuetes decades ago,

"Black? I see." his brow furrowed, yes, he had made the connection,

"He knows I dated you, and I know about the werewolves, just so theres no confusion" I added,

"Is he?" he asked in a cold hard voice, it wasn't very becoming,

"Yes he is, I don't have a problem with that fact, and it is irrelevant to this conversation" the last thing I needed was to have to deal with the whole vampire werewolf enemy thing,

"Of course, I am just worried about you, werewolves are very dangerous"

"and vampires aren't?" I asked pointedly,

"I'm sorry, again, I didn't mean to criticise your.........boyfriend" he had trouble saying the last word, "I do seem to be apologising a lot today, but not for what I came back to apologise for, you deserve to know why I left" he took a deep breath,

"I left because I was sure it was the only way I could keep you safe, I realise now that I was horribly mistaken, but after what happened with Jasper, all I could think of was how dangerous it was for you to be near me, it could only end badly, and the mere thought of losing you was more than I could bear, so I left to keep you safe, from me and my world, or more correctly, my _old_ world"

"You left to keep me safe?" I spoke each word slowly, "but you said....." he held his hand up cutting me short,

"I lied, it's as simple as that, I thought it would be better for you that way, that you would have a better chance of moving on, it seems I was right, but I never stopped loving you, the grief nearly killed me, I went to Volterra to see the Volturi, to ask them to end my existence, they refused, but it turns out that there is an ancient ritual, several millennium old actually, that could grant me what I wished" he paused,

"you."

"I'm sorry I don't understand, how can the Volturi give you, me?" I focused in on this part of the conversation, trying to ignore the fact that he had just said that he still loved me,

"the one thing I desired most was you, but I couldn't be near you without putting you in danger, there seemed no way that we could be together, Aro, of course had read my thoughts and had felt every emotion that flowed through my body, he was incredibly moved that I could feel so strongly, and I must have caught him on a charitable day, because he explained to me that I could be with you again if I so wished. Aro explained that there were ancient rituals, they had been around for millennium, and they haven't been used for as long, one such ritual could return me to my human state"

I sat there quiet, I had a thousand questions, but couldn't seem to spit even one syllable out,

"I know, its a lot to take in, I was keen to do it straight away, but Aro wouldn't , he needed time to prepare and also suggested that I talk to my family, in hindsight I guess it was a really big decision to make" he looked up and grinned,

"Of course everyone was on their way over already, Alice had seen everything, we talked for days about the pros and cons, everyone expressed their opinions, some stronger than others" I could hear sadness behind his words, I wondered if his family had been upset over his decision,

"I had already made my mind up, but I wanted to know how they felt about it, because it would affect them too, now that I am human I can no longer live with them, it's been terribly difficult, not having them to talk to every day, I never knew before how much I leaned on them, how much they supported me." I could see his eyes moisten, and it dawned on me,

_This was what he meant when he said it cost him an awful lot, he gave up his family for you._

I thought the guilt I felt about seeing Edward behind Jacob's back was bad, but now it was even worse, like a boulder siting in the pit of my stomach, a giant, heavy boulder.

"I'm so sorry Edward, I had no idea, I don't know what to say" I reached my hand over to hold his, I don't know whether it helped or made things worse. His skin felt soft and smooth and warm under my hand, a single tear fell down his cheek as he watched my hand stroke his,

"Oh Edward" I cried taking my hand away, I sat up from the bench and went around to sit next to him, it was my turn to wrap my arms around him now, I just wanted to comfort him, I couldn't imagine how he felt right now, giving up his family to come back to me and finding me dating someone else. I may know what it was like to have my heart broken but at least I had people around me to help me put it back together.

I sat there with my arms around him, my head resting on his shoulder, he still smelt amazing, not quite like he used to, it was a subtler smell now, and he was wearing aftershave, something that was new. He still felt nicely chiseled, I wondered if he had to work out now to keep his physique in shape,

_Hold it together girl, what are you doing thinking about his physique?! _

I moved away quickly,

"Bella? did I do something wrong?" he asked, startled by my movement, I moved to the end of the bench, further away from him,

"No, I just don't think that I should be hugging you, I don't want to hurt you anymore"

_and I'm afraid I might feel things I shouldn't_

"You're worried about hurting me? _I_ did this to myself, _I _left you here with a broken heart, it's _my _that you are in love with someone else, _you_ have done nothing wrong, _you _owe me nothing, I am just eternally grateful that you don't hate me"

"but..."

"No Bella, this is all my fault I won't have you feeling guilty over me, I knew it was a distinct possibility that you had moved on with someone else, but I still came back, I may not be able to be your boyfriend anymore, but I can still be your friend, if you'll have me"

"I don't know Edward, I was in a very bad way when you left, I'm talking complete zombie material, I just, I just don't know if I could be in any sort of relationship with you without remembering how it felt, how broken I was, it's just too,..........painful, and then there's Jacob to think about, do you think he would be happy for me to become all bff with my ex boyfriend who was also a vampire once upon a time, I'm sure you know quite well how the Quileutes feel about vampires, and then theres the fact that Charlie has pretty much declared if he ever saw you in Forks again he would kill you, then you'll have o explain to everyone where you went, how come your family packed up and disappeared one night, then all of a sudden you return alone and looking different" I was starting to sound slightly hysterical at this point,

"Don't you think people will notice that your eyes have changed, that your skin has changed, that you don't sound or move or smell the same, did you really give this as much thought as you say Edward, because right now I can see a thousand reasons why you should have stayed a vampire" I was standing now,

"I'm sorry you feel this way Bella, I understand you don't want to be friends, I apologise from the bottom of my heart for what I did to you, I will _never_ forgive myself, for as long as I live" he stood and turned, speaking so quiet I could barely hear,

"You're right Bella, I shouldn't have come back" he turned back towards the car park ,

"Edward.............no...........................wait...............................I........................I'm sorry.......................I didn't.....................please stop" tears started to sting my eyes, I ran forward to catch him, grabbing his arm,

"Stop Edward, I didn't mean I didn't want to be friends, it's just kind of confusing, I'm still trying to wrap my head around the fact that you are back at all, let alone human, just come back and sit down" I grabbed his hand and pulled him back to the table,

"I guess I know how you felt when I left now" his voice was shaky and his eyes wet, I had really hurt him, "If we can be friends I will try everything in my power to make it back up to you"

"I know, but can you see where I am coming from? do you see how complicated this can be?, already is?, you can't expect to land back in Forks and just pick up where we left off, trust _will _be an issue, and I have to say I have no idea how Jacob will react when I tell him about you"

"You mean Jacob doesn't know that I'm back? he doesn't know you're here now?" the surprise showed on his face, "why didn't you tell him?"

"To be honest, my first reaction was to delete your messages and just forget about you, but I couldn't get you out of my head, and I figured I would regret it if I didn't talk to you and find out what was goigng on" I paused,

"Jacob has a temper, and as you are aware he _is_ a werewolf, I can't guarantee that he won't over react, if you were in his shoes, how would _you_ react?" I waited for his response,

"You're right, I'm sure he would have been upset when you told him I was back, but how do you think he will feel when he finds out that you knew I was back days ago, and then met up with me without telling him?"

He had a valid point, I was damned either way, if I did decide to stay friends with Edward, Jacob would know that I kept his return from him, if I told Edward to leave and not come back I'd be a wreck and considering I'm a terrible liar there would be no way of keeping it from him, I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket,

_Babe, I'm leaving Makah now on way to your place, can't wait to see you. xxx_

"It's Jacob, he's on his way to my house, I better get going" my hands started to shake, I had to make a decision, I wasn't prepared,

"Bella, do you think we can be friends?"

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**You should know by now, I love leaving you on a little cliffy!! I like to play with your minds! Mwahahaha *cough* *splutter* **

**So please review it makes me happy!  
**


	10. Conflict

**I apologise profusely for not updating sooner, but my computer died a horrible death so I can only update when I get the chance to borrow someone Else's.**

**Also I only gave it a real quick check begore uploading it, so please forgive the errors, i'm sure there are heaps. :)**

**Conflict**

I stood and looked at Edward, his clear green eyes pleading with me, did I have it in my heart to forgive him completely?, of course I did, but did I have it in my heart to do this to Jacob?, I just wasn't sure,

"I don't know Edward, I need to think about this, and speak to Jacob, I'm not saying yes, but I'm not saying no either, just give me some time to think, I'll let you know, okay?" It was the best that I could give him right now, I couldn't live without him in my life, but it would be extremely difficult to keep him in my life,

"That's more than I could ask for Bella, I understand completely, take all the time that you need", he looked relieved, I held out my hand and grasped his, the warmth of his skin was still strange to me,

"Thank you, I'll contact you soon, I better get home before Jacob gets there and wonders where I am" I dropped his hand and headed off to the car park, I knew what I had to do.

Driving the short distance home I was struck by a bout of nerves, I wasn't sure if I was ready for this, but if I didn't let Jacob know now that Edward was back it would just make it so much worse. I pulled into the drive and switched off the engine, there was perfect silence, the porch light was still off meaning that Charlie wasn't home yet, he'd probably be at the hospital late again. I let myself in and flicked lights on as I moved through the house, dumping my bag in my room and heading back downstairs to start dinner. My stomach rumbled as I surveyed the contents of the fridge, it was pretty empty, I settled on some leftover lasagne. Engrossed in my meal turning round and round in the microwave I didn't hear Jacob until he grabbed me around the waist from behind,

"Hey beautiful, I missed you today" as he kissed the side of my neck I noticed the sadness in his voice,

"Are you okay Jacob? what's happened?" I turned in his arms putting my hands on his shoulders, I could only just reach, his eyes were red, like he'd been crying,

"I got a call from Billy a minute ago, Harry didn't make it" his voice cracked, showing his emotion, I moved my arms around him and held him tight,

"I'm so sorry Jacob, Harry was a lovely man, his poor family" I felt tears well in my own eyes, "Is Billy okay?" I asked,

"He's pretty upset, him and Charlie are staying at the hospital to help Sue with arrangements, I think Leah and Seth headed home" we moved over to the table, my appetite all but gone. Jacob slammed his fist down on the table making me jump,

"It's not fair, Harry was a good man, why did this happen to him, he was too young to die" I move my chair closer and put my arm around him, he sighed,

"Harry was a huge part of the tribe, not only as an elder, he did a lot of other stuff with the kids, and whenever anyone was in trouble or needed a helping hand he was the first there, ready to help anyone, anytime, the rez will be a poorer place without him that's for sure, he was a huge part of the pack, like a father to us all, he was especially close to Sam, it will be real hard on him"

I sat next to Jacob unitl the sky had grown dark outside, I didn't know what to say to make him feel better, I didn't have much experience with grief, I figured just sitting with him and holding him was the best that I could do. It was a while before either of us spoke again,

"So how was school today? learn anything interesting? find a cure for cancer or an answer for world peace?" he shifted around to look at me, it seemed like he just wanted to talk about anything to get his mind off Harry, I just prayed he wouldn't ask me what I had done after school,

"Same old, same old, mostly revision and stuff before exams, we had theory in gym so that's always a bonus" I gave him a smile, he chuckled,

"Also a bonus for the other students" he burst out laughing, I slapped his chest,

"Hey! I never hurt anyone, well, not that bad anyway" I joined in laughing, "we're doing raquet ball next, and that ball is pretty hard, so no doubt there will be some injuries once we start" Jacob had taught me not to take myself so seriously and I found myself more and more making fun of my own clumsiness,

"God help them" he said,

"So, how was your day at Makah?" I asked, glad that his mood seemed to be improving, and I was trying to steer the conversation away from what I had done with my day,

"Good, we have our annual get together coming up and we all got together to throw around some ideas, we are going to try and get the younger ones involved this year, tribe pride and all that" he gave me a big smile, "lets go get more comfortable, there's a game on tonight I wanted to watch"

I sighed, boys will be boys, and of course that meant watching sport. We went into the lounge and I turned the TV on, low and behold there was football on, I went and grabbed my book from the coffee table, I might as well get something to keep me occupied while he was engrossed in the game. I sat down on the opposite end of the couch and put my feet up in his lap, he wrapped his big hands around them and rubbed gently,

"Hmmmmm, that's nice" I said opening my book "feel free to do that all night"

"All night" he said arching his eyebrow, I rolled my eyes at him. He was quickly absorbed in the game, and I tried hard to immerse myself in the book in my lap, it was a losing battle. I went over and over in my head ways that I could bring up the fact that Edward was back, nothing sounded appropriate, and then there was the fact that he was still dealing with the grief from Harry's death, I could still see the sadness behind his eyes, how could I even consider bringing this up when he was already upset, but maybe I was just making excuses so I wouldn't have to deal with this today.

It was half time now and Jacob turned his attention back to me, he hadn't even noticed that I hadn't yet turned a page in my book, but then my worst fears were realised,

"So what did you do this afternoon? moping around missing me no doubt?" he said with a cheeky grin, I felt the blood drain from my face, it was now or never. I swung my feet off his lap and took a deep breath,

"Jacob, I have something I need to tell you" he sat up straight, his brows furrowed with worry, or was it fright, it was probably both,

"I don't like that sound of this, what's going on Bella?"

"Just promise me you won't be mad at me okay?" I reached my hand over and placed it on his leg, it felt very tense under my fingers,

"Bella" he said in a growl,

"Um, well the other day when I was in the store I ran into someone, someone I didn't really expect to see" I glanced up to check his expression, it remained blank,

"Go on"

"Well" I took a deep breath, "I pretty much went into shock, I practically ran out of the store actually" I was stalling now,

"Just tell me Bella" he was starting to get angry now,

"Edward was there" I waited for his reaction, he was frozen, stunned into complete immobility, I gave him a few minutes, "Jacob, say something, please"

"Edward" it sounded like a profanity they way he spat it out, "I'll kill him" I could feel him start to shake underneath my palm,

"Jacob, calm down, it's not what you think" I could see him fight with the tremors, I trusted him to stay under control, he wouldn't let himself phase near me,

"Filthy bloodsucker, if he comes near you again" he face was furious, I swallowed, my mouth suddenly dry,

"Just let me explain"

"There's more?"

"He's not a vampire anymore, he's human now" Jacob stood up from the couch, his hands balled into fists, I could see the tremors roll down his spine, it was starting to scare me,

"Impossible" he shook his head,

"No, it's true, he went to Italy, they were able to make him human again, trust me he is" I stood up and moved towards Jacob, he backed away like he didn't want me near him,

"Have a nice cosy chat did we?" his voice was loaded with sarcasm "I thought you said that you practically ran out of the store, obviously not, not if you know that he went to Italy, not if you're so sure that he's human now, what the hell Bella" he was yelling now,

"No Jacob, I did leave straight away, I came straight home" my voice was small,

"Then explain to me how you seem to know so much, and while you're there why don't you explain why you didn't tell me straight away, that was days ago Bella, why are you only telling me now?"

"Because I didn't know what to think, I didn't want to upset you unnecessarily, I ran out when he tried to speak to me, I though that would be the end of it" I hung my head, ashamed

"You thought that would be the end of it? what do you mean? did he contact you? Bella answer me" I looked up at him,

"He texted me yesterday morning, he wanted to get together and talk" the words came out as a whisper, he still heard them clear as a bell,

"Yesterday morning................that's why you had the day off school wasn't it?" I nodded, a look of realisation spread across his face,

"Yesterday" he repeated, "Bella, you told me yesterday that you loved me, did you only say it because he was back?" his voice was barely above a whisper now too,

"No Jacob, I do love you, it had nothing to do with Edward, I swear" I was pleading now,

"Then why haven't you said it before?"

"I don't know, I didn't think I was ready, maybe Edward turning up showed me how much I do love you"

"So it was because of him" he turned his back on me,

"Maybe, but it only showed me that I really do love you, and only you, with all my heart, that's why I'm telling you this now, you deserve the truth" he turned around to face me again,

"Yes I deserve the truth, I deserved it two days ago Bella, how do you think I feel that you kept this from me, did you think I wouldn't find out, were you planning on keeping this from me? don't you think that the pack would realise that they were back and I would find out? or are they all human now?"

"No, the Cullens aren't back, it's just Edward, he had to leave his family when he regained his mortality" Jacob sat on the chair and put his head in his hands, I couldn't believe I had done this to him, I wanted the earth to open up and swallow me, "Jacob, I love you, I want to be with you, you don't have to worry about Edward, he knows that we are together"

"And how does he know this?, and how do you know so much about what's going on with him? i'm sure it wasn't via one text message" I sat down on the couch, scared about what might happen next.

"I agreed to meet him, we met up after school today" I pulled my legs up and curled my arms around them, ready for his outburst,

"WHAT!!!" he stood up so fast out of the chair he knocked it over into the wall with a huge crash, "WHAT WERE YOU THINKING, HOW COULD YOU MEET UP WITH HIM, DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT HE DID TO YOU?" his whole body was shaking now, I could see the huge effort he was putting in trying to reign himself back in,

"I needed to know why he did it, why he left, and I was curious about him becoming human again, I thought it was only fair to give him the chance to explain" all I could do was watch while Jacob composed himself,

"Fair, was it fair what he did to you, I remember what you were like that first day when you came to see me with the motorbikes, you were broken Bella and he did that to you, and you want to hear what he has to say, I suppose he had some great excuse to explain it all, that doesn't change anything Bella, I couldn't care less if he came back human, he could have come back as a hippo and it wouldn't matter, if he ever comes back to Forks again I'll kill him" the look in his eye told me he wasn't bluffing,

"Jacob, he left to protect me, not to hurt me, and he gave up his family so he could become human, you have no idea how guilty he feels about what he did"

"Great, I see he has you wound around his little finger already, I might as well grab my stuff and go home now" he headed towards the door, I stood in his way

"No Jacob, it's not like that, I'm with you, I love you" I wrapped my arms tightly around his waist, I wasn't letting him go

"You keep saying that, but you still agreed to meet with him behind my back, you say he knows about us? does that mean he's left again? or is he going to hang around and try and win you back, because I won't let you go without a fight"

"He's not like that Jacob, I told him how much you mean to me and he backed off, he only wants to be friends"

"I hope you told him no, he doesn't deserve a friend like you"

"I said I wasn't sure, I told him I wanted to talk to you and think about things first" I felt Jacobs body tense up and begin to shake, he unwrapped my arms from around my waist and pushed me away, I tripped on the edge of the mat and fell into the coffee table, knocking everything off, then I heard a loud bang and looked up to see the lounge window smash, glass spraying all over the floor and me, before I could completely register what was happeing I saw Edward climbing in through the smashed window,

"HOW DARE YOU HURT HER" he bellowed lunging towards Jacob.

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**I know I promised some that this chapter would have some hot Edward v Jacob action but I wanted to update quick so I promise the next one will! But I can't promise when the next update will be, hopefully I can get near a computer in the next 3-4 days, just don't hold me to that :).**

**I'm not sure who I want Bella to side with in the next chapter, or maybe she'll be furious with both, let me know what you would prefer!**

**That all said and done please review! **


	11. Mad

**I'm back! On my own computer even! :) This chapter took longer to write than I'd planned because I kept changing my mind in which direction I wanted it to head, but it's all done now and here for your reading pleasure. Enjoy. **

**Mad**

It all happened so fast, one minute I had my arms wrapped around Jacob's torso, the next I was flat on my back on the floor covered in glass watching as Edward threw himself at Jacob, arms outstretched like he was going to strangle him, the look in his eyes was truly frightening. I pushed myself up off the floor, barely registering the pain as I cut my palms in the shattered glass from the window, I heard the dull thud of bodies crashing together as I got to my feet, Edward had pushed Jacob into the couch pushing it up against the wall, it almost looked like they were embracing, arms wrapped around each other, the growls and profanity indicated otherwise, I could see both of them trying to throw punches whilst trying to keep a hold on the other, I could also tell that Jacob was shaking, this fact spurred me into action, if he phased now Edward wouldn't stand a chance, I didn't doubt for a second that if he had the chance, Jacob would kill him.

"STOP, STOP IT NOW!" my voice came out shrill, sounding almost hysterical, and nowhere near loud enough for the two men fighting to hear. I stepped around the broken coffee table, glass crunching underfoot, they were standing again now, wrestling, Jacob had his hand around Edward's throat trying to choke him, Edwards knuckles white as he tried to prise his fingers away, his face was getting redder and redder, as a mortal he lacked the strength necessary to free himself from the werewolf's deadly grip. I reached over and grabbed Jacob's arm, trying to pull him away from Edward,

"Don't, your going to kill him, stop Jacob, please" I was putting all my weight into pulling his arm away, I might as well have been trying to pull a wing off an airplane, I tried a different approach,

"Please Jacob, let him go.........................for me" I stood in front of him, looking up into his eyes, he was still staring at Edwards face, which was now a deep red, almost purple shade, I could hear him trying desperately to draw breath, I grabbed his chin, pulling his face so he was forced to look at me, I just hoped I could convince him to let go,

"Jacob, listen to me, if you don't let go you are going to kill him" I saw hate flare in his eyes,

"I know" his voice was a low growl, full of malice,

"Don't do it Jacob, please, he's a mortal now, how would you feel if you murdered a human, please stop Jacob, if you kill him you _will _regret it, not to mention the fact that you will go to jail" I looked right into his eyes "and you'll lose me" I hoped this last fact would shake him out of his blood lust. I noticed the muscles in his arm relax, and I heard Edward pull in a sharp breaths, he may have loosened his grip but Jacob still didn't let go of his throat,

"What the hell do you think you are doing back here?" even I could tell this question was purely rhetorical, "How dare you show your face around here, you have no right to be getting into contact with Bella after what you did to her" I could see Jacob remembering the shape I was in back then, and his grip tightened around Edwards neck,

"There is no way you deserve to be her friend, you might think you can guilt her into being friends with you again, or maybe you think this superhero act might get you back in her good books, but I'll tell you something you lowlife bloodsucker, you _will _be leaving Forks today and you _will not_ be contacting Bella again" the snarl was back in his voice, I'd never seen Jacob so mad and so _frightening_ before, Edward wrenched himself free of Jacobs grasp,

"I think that might be Bella's decision don't you?, or is she under your control now? is that why you think you can push her around?" he looked furious, he thought Jacob had been hurting me, I spoke up,

"No Edward, Jake wasn't pushing me around like that, I tripped over the mat and fell, he wasn't hurting me" there was an unintentional edge to my voice, and another thought occurred to me,

"Exactly what were you doing outside my window anyway? were you spying on me?" now _I _was getting angry with him, he looked upset,

"No, no it wasn't like that Bella, I knew you were coming back here to Jacob and I knew that you were going to tell him about me being back and I got worried, especially since you told me he was a werewolf" his face scrunched up at the word, it was easy to see that even though he wasn't a vampire anymore he still held werewolves as the enemy, that feeling was rooted too deeply to change, "I just wanted to make sure you were okay" Jacob and I spoke at the same time,

"I think I can take care of myself Edward, I don't need protection from my boyfriend" he flinched at the word _boyfriend, _Jacob put his arm around me,

"She's right, _I _would never hurt her, can you say the same? I don't think so" he had a smug look on his face, I wasn't sure whether I was happy he didn't seem to be mad at me anymore or annoyed because he was goading Edward,

"I explained that situation to Bella, I don't think I have to explain myself to you pup" I was surprised to see a sneer on his face, Jacob withdrew his arm and moved in between Edward and myself,

"perhaps you do need to explain it to me considering that I was the one who had to pick up the pieces for her, I was the one the had to put her back together again, you have no idea what you did to her"

"And I regretted it every moment that I was gone, you can't make me feel any worse than I already do" he glanced in my direction, remorse filled his eyes,

"Wanna bet" Jacob stepped closer clenching his fists, I pulled on his arm,

"No, no more fighting please"

"He deserves to be hurt Bella, he did it to you, now someone needs to do it to him" I tugged on his arm again but he was just too strong, I noticed Edward take a step back, "what's the matter pretty boy, afraid I'll screw up your pretty boy face?"

"I don't want to fight you Jacob, that's not why I came back

"But it's what you are going to get" I rushed to stand in between them, I didn't want to see them fight again, especially over me, I placed a hand on both their chests, I could see Jacob's jaw tense as he looked at my hand laying on Edward's chest,

"Will you two just grow up, there's no need to fight, Edward I already told you, Jacob was not hurting me and Jacob, he has explained to me why he left and why he came back and I'm okay with that, there is no need to hit him, god, what is with you guys and the testosterone overload" they just continued to glare at one and other,

"If you guys are able to be civil for ten seconds I'm going to grab the dustpan and broom to clean this mess up, if either of you start fighting again so help me I will throw you both out" with a final warning glance at both of their faces I dropped my hands and headed to the kitchen, as I opened the cupboard under the sink I realised that I had left then pan and broom out on the back step from when I had accidentally broke a glass, I walked around the hallway and paused to poke my head around the lounge room door, neither of them had moved a muscle, still standing opposite one another, glaring, their faces filled with loathing. I unlatched the back door and stepped out into the cold night, it was surprisingly clear, I could see the stars where the clouds were thin, the cool air felt nice on my face, the dustpan and broom were right where I left them, the remnants of the broken glass still sitting in the bottom, I had been running late for school and hadn't had time to empty them in to the bin. I started off across the yard towards the bins, I could hear quiet talking from the house, that was a good sign, at least they weren't yelling at each other. I emptied the glass into the bin and looked around, it really was a beautiful night, quiet and calm, a stark contrast to inside the house. As I made my way back across the yard the voices inside suddenly got louder, I froze in the middle of the dark lawn, I could hear exactly what they were saying,

"Yeah, you heard me" I heard Jacob laugh,

"How dare you talk about her like that, would you like me to tell her what you just said, or perhaps you'd like me to wipe that smug look of your face myself" Edward's voice carried as clear as a bell to where I stood, god I hope he didn't hit Jacob,

"This is between me and you, you don't have to run off and blab to Bella because you can't handle what I have to say"

"Well what you have to say isn't very pleasant, how do you think Bella would feel if she heard you talking about her like that, do you think she would forgive you, she's not that sort of girl dog"

"Yeah and how would you know leech, you haven't been around, she's changed, she willing to do _so much more _nowadays, if you catch my drift" I might not be the smartest person on the planet but even I caught the drift. Anger pulsed through my veins and strode purposely back towards the house, Edward was right, how dare he talk about me like that. I burst in through the door and walked straight into the lounge, I still had the dustpan in my hand, I lifted my arm and threw it as hard as possible at Jacob's head, he was too fast and ducked his head and it fell harmlessly to the floor, Edward stepped back into the corner of the room,

"How dare you, you arrogant, rude, loathsome sleaze, do you think our relationship is something you can just use to rub in his face, it is none of his, or anyone's business what we do in our spare time, but you use it like some sort of ammunition, does it mean that little to you?" I was furious, the huge werewolf in front of me was actually backing away, hands help palm up in front of him,

"No, Bella, I didn't mean, I wouldn't, I.........I.........I"

"Save it Jacob, I don't want to hear it, I heard what you said loud and clear and if that's the way you feel you can get out right now" I pointed towards the door,

"Bells, I'm sorry, truly I am, I was just mad, I didn't mean it to come out like that"

"You didn't mean it to come out like that? how about it shouldn't have come out at all!. Go Jacob, I don't want to be near you right now" Jacob walked over and grabbed my hand and started pleading,

"You don't mean that, you can't, he started it, talking about how he was going to win you back, I just wanted him to know how much we love each other, that there's no way he can come between us" I pulled my hand away from his,

"I'm not breaking up with you Jacob I just need time to calm down and think" I turned to Edward, "Is that true, did you tell Jacob that you were going to win me back?" he looked guilty,

"Yes, I'm sorry Bella" he hung his head like a child,

"You said you only wanted to be friends, that you had accepted that I had moved on, and you said I had all the time I needed to decide whether I _would_ be your friend again, now you're here sprouting off to my _boyfriend_ how you are going to win me back, conceited much Edward?"

They both looked at me sheepishly, I didn't want to be near either of them right now,

"Can you both leave please, I want to be alone, I'd appreciate it if neither of you visited, called, texted or anything else, I'll contact you when _I'm _ready, and no fighting when you leave, don't forget that this is the police chief's house, and if I hear of you two fighting each other anywhere, anytime you can both forget about being my friend full stop" I stood aside as they filed out of the lounge room and went out the front door, I closed it a bit hard, the loud bang echoing through the now empty house.

I went back into the lounge, retrieved the dustpan and started sweeping the glass up that was strewn all over the floor, luckily it was only the small window next to the bookcase not the large one on the south wall, it didn't take long to clean up. I got the vacuum out of the hall cupboard and ran it over the whole room catching any of the shards that were too small to see. After moving all the furniture back to its original place and putting everything back onto the coffee table, I looked over at the window, a light breeze blew in blowing the curtains into the room, I wouldn't be able to sleep if I didn't close it up somehow, I went back to the hall cupboard and searched around for something to cover the hole up with, luckily I found a tarpaulin at the back, that would have to do until tomorrow when I could organise a glazier. I placed the tarp on the window and fastened it all the way around with silver duct tape, at least it would keep the cold out, and rain that would no doubt start overnight. I was thankful to think that Charlie wouldn't be home tonight, it gave me time to think out a story to explain the broken window, I'm sure I could convince him that I fell into it or something along those lines.

I looked up at the clock, it was nearly midnight, no wonder I felt so tired, it had been a long and strange day, but it looked like I would be having a lot of those from now on. As I crawled into bed, not even worrying about the events of the night or the decisions I was going to have to make in the future could keep me awake, let myself fall into peaceful oblivion.

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**I promised myself I wouldn't leave this one on a cliffy, you can thank me for that when you review :D Look the button is right there, you know you want to click on it...........................  
**


	12. Sorry

**I have now set myself a deadline of updating every weekend, here's hoping I can stick to it :)**

**Also I want to say a HUGE thank you to everyone that has reviewed or added this story to their favourites and alerts, it means heaps and encourages me to work harder! **

**Sorry**

The next few days seemed to drag, each minute longer than the one before, they passed by in slow motion, school, work, dinner, sleep, school, work, dinner and sleep, yet I couldn't remember any part of them, it was like my brain was on autopilot, not focusing, just going through the motions. I woke up to the sound of rain, no surprise there, and as I dragged myself out of my warm bed I heard Charlie pottering around downstairs, that was strange, he was usually long gone before I got out of bed. I headed down the stairs to find him in the kitchen making himself some cereal, as least he couldn't burn that,

"Morning dad, you going in to work late today?" I asked as I poured myself a glass of juice, he shook his head,

"Bells I swear you'd forget your head if it wasn't screwed on, you don't remember me telling you that Harry's funeral was today?" that would explain the glum look on my father's face,

"Oh, sorry Dad, I totally forgot" I wondered when he had told me, I guess it had been in the last few days, obviously I had taken in even less than I thought, "what time was it again?"

"Starts at noon, over at the reservation, you still coming?" apparently I had nodded and 'hhmmmd' my way through a whoe conversation,

"Of course" I put my hand on his shoulder "I'll be there for you dad" I saw his face flush red, he always had trouble when people started expressing emotions,

"Jacob will be there, I haven't seen him around the last few days, you guys okay?" he looked worried,

"We had a bit of a fight the other day, we're all good though, he's just giving me some space to cool down" Charlie nodded got up and put his bowl in the sink,

"I'm just going to head into the station for an hour or so to finish up some paperwork, I'll be back in time to get ready for the funeral" he grabbed his jacket and headed out the door, I felt a cold blast of air sweep through the kitchen, it reminded me of the broken window.

Charlie had noticed the window the second he had got home, guess you can't hide anyting from a policeman, I remember he headed straight up to my room and banged on the door,

"Bella! are you awake?" I hadn't been but I sure was when he opened the door,

"How in God's name did that window get broken?" he stood in the doorway, hands on hips, I wiped the sleep from my eyes,

"Um, what? oh, the window" I decided to play the sleepy card, give myself a second to think, "I tripped over the rug and accidentally put my elbow through it, I'm sorry, I'll call the glazier on the morning" I was glad that he hadn't turned on the light, h wouldn't be able to see the lie on my face on the dark. He clicked his tongue, shook his head and left, as he shut the door I swear I heard him say,

"Typical Bella"

I cleaned up our breakfast dishes and headed upstairs to find something appropriate to wear, I didn't own a lot of black clothes, with my pale skin it made me look like a goth, I decided on black pants and a dark grey fitted blouse, I laid them out ready as I headed for the bathroom. After a long hot shower I dressed and put my hair up in a simple twist, I inspected myself in the mirror, I looked presentable enough. As I walked down the stairs I heard my father come back in the door, I called out,

"Cutting it a little fine aren't we? You'll have to hurry if you don't want to be late" I heard my father huff, sounded like things hadn't gone well at work,

"Bella, when were you planning on telling me?" the tone in his voice scared me, he sounded mad, very very mad, I had no idea what he what he was talking about,

"Dad, I can honestly say I have no idea what you are talking about" his forehead creased,

"Really? So you don't know anything about the silver Volvo that I pulled over today?" I felt my stomach drop,

"Oh"

"Why didn't you tell me he was back Bella? Slip your mind did it?" yeah, Charlie was pissed,

"No it didn't but I didn't think it mattered that much" I shrugged my shoulders, "I guess he missed Forks and decided to come back"

"I don't believe that for a second Bella, but don't worry I warned him that if he came near you he better watch out, I don't need him screwing with your head again" I glared at my father,

"Dad, I don't think that was entirely necessary, I am more than capable of taking care of myself, and I think it's my choice who I talk to, not yours" I was annoyed that he had interfered, Charlie looked confused,

"But I don't understand, after the way he left I thought........" his voice trailed away, a look of realisation crept across his face,

"Is that why you and Jacob have been fighting? Bella, did you guys break up? over Edward Cullen?"

"No Dad! we have not broken up, Edward came to see me the other day while Jacob was here" I decided skimming over the finer details was a good idea at this point "they started fighting and behaving like Neanderthals and I threw them both out, I have it all under control, you don't need to worry" I was getting defensive, I didn't appreciate Charlie thinking that he had a right to intrude in my relationships, no matter how much he thought he was doing the right thing, I hardly needed protection from Edward Cullen.

"Sorry Bells, I wasn't trying to intrude or anything, I just worry about you" he blushed, "I better go get ready or we'll be late" he rushed up the stairs, seemingly more to get away from my glare than the rush to get ready.

A short time later we were in the cruiser driving down the highway towards La Push, Charlie was speeding, thankfully he couldn't pull himself over, and at least it would stop us from being late. Charlie parked the car a short distance from the cemetery, we rushed over arriving just in time, luckily the rain had stopped although it was still cold. I could see Sue standing near the grave, either side of her were Seth and Leah their faces full of grief, my heart went out to them. The service was short but lovely and lots of tears were shed, as everyone started to move away I noticed Jacob walking towards me, he looked very nice in his suit, incredibly attractive actually,

"Hey Bells, how are things?" his eyes were rimmed with red, he'd been crying, it nearly broke my heart to see him this vulnerable,

"Things are fine Jacob, I've been going to call you, just wasn't sure if you would want to speak to me" he moved forward and grabbed me into a bone crunching hug,

"Of course I want to speak to you, I was worried that you weren't going to call, I picked up the phone a thousand times, but I kept remembering that you said that you would contact me" he stepped back and bent down and kissed me gently, "I'm so so so sorry Bella, I don't know what got into me, i just got so jealous, you know I didn't mean anything by it, I'll do anything to make it up to you I swear, anything" he kissed me again,

"I missed you to Jacob, but what you did, it wasn't very nice, can you understand how it made me feel?" his face dropped,

"I know, it was despicable, I guess I was just claiming my territory or something" he winked, that was my Jacob, trying to make jokes to ease the situation, I slapped him,

"I am not territory to be claimed Jacob Black, you should remember that" I wrapped my arms around his waist, it felt like coming home. I surprised myself in forgiving him so easily, but I had done a lot of contemplating over the last few days, yes, he had used our physical relationship as something to rub into Edwards face, but Edward had provoked him, and what more could I expect from a sixteen year old boy, sometimes I had to remind myself that he was younger than me, he just seemed older because of his imposing physicality and of course the responsibility of being one of the tribe's protectors. It would take a lot to earn my trust back, but I had no doubt that he would be better behaved from now on.

Jacob didn't let go of my hand once during the whole wake, it seemed like the entire Quiluete tribe was there and several members from other tribes nearby, Harry was a much loved and respected member of the community, we spoke to Sue and her children, conveying our sympathy, we could only chat for a minute as others crowded around to speak to her, giving their sympathy as well, Jacob leaned in close to my ear,

"Want to go for a walk?" I nodded. He pulled me through the crowd and out of the door,

"It was getting stuffy in there, I thought you'd like some fresh air" we headed off towards the beach, our usual hangout when I was in La Push, "Its been a hard couple of days for me Bella, I've been kicking myself the entire time" I held my hand up to stop him mid sentence,

"Stop Jacob, I understand that you're sorry, and I know that you mean it, I forgive you, but understand this, it might be a while before our relationship" I blushed "gets physical again" he nodded,

"I completely understand, but can I ask something of you too?"

"Of course"

"Will you be more honest with me from now on?" his gaze was intense, I felt that familiar guilt well in my stomach,

"Absolutely, I should be apologising to you too, for not telling you that Edward was back as soon as I knew, it was wrong and meeting hm behind your back, it was very stupid of me, I still feel bad about that, I had no idea that things were going t happen like they did" a blast of cold air blew around us off the ocean and I shivered, Jacob took off his suit jacket and wrapped it around my shoulders, it fell halfway down to my knees, but it was toasty warm and smelled just like him,

"Your forgiven Bells, we've both been kinda stupid in the last week, I guess our stupidity cancels each others out" he barked out a deep laugh, "I don't like to ask but what _are_ your plans about Edward?" we reached our branch and sat down on the bleached wood,

"I've been thinking about it and I would like to stay his friend, but I will be making it _very_ clear that it is only friendship, and if he tried for anything more than that he can leave town for good, I don't expect you to undersatnd, actually I don't even think I can explain why I want to stay his friend, but I do and I need you both to understand that I won't put up with anymore macho bullshit, I can be your girlfriend and his friend at the same time, I don't expect you to get all chummy and friendly with each other, but as long as you both respect my decisions I think it can work just fine" Jacob's jaw tightened, he didn't like this news, but it was my decision, he was just going to have to live with it.

We headed back to the wake hand in hand, Jacob hadn't said much since I told him my decision, it must have annoyed him but he was keeping quiet about it. Charlie found us as soon as we walked in the door,

"I've been looking for you everywhere, where did you go?"

"We've just been out for a walk to get some fresh air" I saw a small smile on his face as he spied Jacob and I holding hands,

"You guys okay? got everything sorted out?" Jacob looked down at me, I guess he was surprised that I had talked to Charlie about our fight,

"Yeah, we're good Dad, you ready to go?" I noticed the keys in his hand,

"As soon as you are Bells, or are you going to stay with Jacob?"

"Actually I have some things I need to take care of this afternoon, some calls I need to make" I turned to Jacob, "But you are welcome to come over later tonight if you want?" I really hoped he would,

"I'd love to, see you around seven?"

"Sounds perfect" I reached up and kissed him "See you later, love you" I saw my Dad slip discreetly out the door,

"Love you too"

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**Well there it is! I know people will probably think she forgave Jacob too soon (I wouldn't have) but in order for the story to keep moving forward I think it had to happen, I was also going to have Bella's coversation with Edward in this chapter but I want to make more of it so it'll be up next! **


	13. Guarantee

**I know, I know. I promised to update every weekend, and I've missed a few *hides* but I've had some stuff going on and I went away for Easter, but I'm back on it now!! Although I am going away again this weekend for a Supernatural convention *SQUEE* so I'm getting in before I head off. Also in my little hiatus I laid out story lines for the next ten chapters or so, I had actually only been writing each chapter on a whim, so didn't have a real definite plan on where it was heading, but that's all changed now, and I have some good stuff in store for you all! One of my faithful reviewers Zephyr Girl 77 had a great idea and that will be coming up in the next few chapters, so hats off to you! you're awesome!! Enough of my rambling, get reading!! :) **

**Don't forget the usual: I don't own Twilight or the characters, I just dream about them :)  
**

**Guidelines**

The drive home with Charlie was quiet, I sat watching the green forest pass by, neither of us felt the need to fill the silence with conversation. As we passed the city limits of Forks Charlie cleared his throat,

"Nice to see you and Jacob getting along again"

"Yeah, we're all good now. There were a lot of people at the funeral", I tried to steer the conversation away from my love life,

"Just goes to show what a great man Harry was, he'll be sorely missed" a sad look crossed his face as we pulled into the driveway, I figured Charlie wanted to spend some time alone,

"I've got some calls to make, I'll probably be in my room until Jacob gets here, that okay?"

"Of course, there's a game tonight anyway, don't know how good a company I'll be anyways" Charlie said as he went upstairs, undoubtedly to change out of his suit. I grabbed the phone as I headed up to my room. I quickly changed into my old sweats and holey t-shirt, and put my hair up in a loose ponytail,

_Might as well make myself comfortable _I thought to myself. Throwing the clothes I had worn onto the growing pile of laundry I grabbed the phone of the desk, no point putting it off any longer. I checked my mobile to get Edward's number and dialled it into the home phone, it took a second before it started ringing, each passing second the nervous knot in my stomach growing tighter, it continued to ring,

_ring ring, ring ring,_

_Great no ones home_ I thought, as I pulled the phone away from my head to hang up I heard a voice, a voice I'd know anywhere,

_"Hello?"_

My heart pounded furiously in my chest, I had no idea why I was so nervous,

"Hello, Edward?"

_"Bella!"_

I could hear the excitement in his voice, it took me by surprise,

"Uh, yeah it's me, how are you?" this was going to be more awkward than I had imagined,

_"I'm great now, I'm so glad you called, I was worried that you wouldn't. Just let me say that I am so so so sorry about the other night, I was worried about you, that's the only reason I was outside your window, and when I saw you fall, you have to understand, it looked like he pushed you, you have no idea how mad that made me, I'm sorry about the window and I'm sorry I attacked Jacob, but it was blind rage, the idea of you being hurt....................I couldn't bear it, and then when he was saying things about you, it made me think he doesn't deserve you so I said I would win you back , I'm sorry, truly I am, I know you have a boyfriend and I have no right to be thinking things like that, you have my word that I won't do anything to jeopardise our friendship, that is of course that you have decided that we can be friends?"_

"You going to let me get a word in Edward?"

_"Sorry"_

"Stop saying sorry Edward. I called to say that I _do _want to be friends, but there are rules, I'm sure you can understand"

_"Of course, I'll do anything, or not do anything, whatever you say" _

I felt bad, he sounded so desperate, and I was about to dictate terms of friendship to him,

"First of all you have to remember that Jacob is my boyfriend, and no matter what you think of him and the fact that he is a werewolf that topic is out of bounds, and it means that there is to be no romantic gestures or any attempts to 'win me back' "

_"Of course, you have my word, what else?"_

"Actually that's pretty much it, but it is the be all and end all of our friendship, there will be no more of the macho bullshit that happened the other night, I've told Jacob pretty much the same thing, however you guys feel towards each other, you will not involve me, I am neutral, I am Switzerland"

There was quiet on the other end of the line, all I could hear was his low even breaths,

"Edward?"

_"I'm here, I was just thinking"_

"About?"

_"About how happy I am right now, about how coming back here was the best thing I have ever done, about how grateful I am that you've given me a second chance"_

"That's a lot of thinking" I heard him giggle, it was such a strange sound coming from him, maybe because I was used to the old contemplative, reserved Edward,

_"I'm glad too, I can get back to school now, I was worried I was going to miss too much"_

"Back to school?"

_"I'm still seventeen Bella, I need to finish school, thankfully this will be the last time, but I put off going back because I wasn't sure if you would want me to be around every day" _

"Oh" I hadn't even thought about Edward coming back to school, honestly I hadn't thought much about anything lately, it was like I had been living in a little bubble all by myself, "But theres only a few weeks left before break, why would you bother, it's not like your going to learn anything you don't already know"

_"That's true, but to be honest I'm bored as hell, I've been spending all my time by myself, a bit of human interaction would be nice" _

"Oh right, actually that reminds me, can you still read peoples minds? or did that stop when you..............you know, changed back?"

_"No, it stopped, I can't say that it doesn't frustrate me, but after having 90 odd years of mind reading I have a pretty good grasp of human nature, it's not hard to know what people are thinking if you really pay attention"_

"Wow, it must have been really hard for you adjusting" I found it hard to keep the sarcasm out of my voice, "Sorry, but now you know what it's like for the rest of us" he laughed,

_"Thanks for caring"_

"You know I care, but I have to admit, it's nice to be on an even footing now"

_"But don't forget that I still have nearly one hundred years of life experience on you" _I could hear the smile in his voice, it was going to be easier than I thought to be friends with Edward Cullen.

"Edward, can I ask you a question?"

_"You just did" _there was that chuckle again,

"There's no need to be smart, I was being serious"

_"Sorry, you know you can ask me anything" _

"What was it like? I mean changing back, it must have been really hard"

_"Do you mean the physical part of changing back? or how I coped afterwards?"_

"Both I guess, I'm intrigued"

_"Well the change was pretty fast, it was only the case of a few words and a quick ritual, and I was good to go, but afterwards...........I'll be honest it was difficult"_

"How so?"

_"Re-adjusting was hard, from having such heightened senses, to everything being dull and quiet, and everything going so slow. Every experience was new, from hunger to sleep to needing to go to the bathroom, and I was exceptionally clumsy at first, but I've been getting better, do you have any idea how much I hurt myself those first few weeks?" _he laughed, _"It's kind of embarrassing really, I ended up in hospital once, I misjudged how fast I could cross the road and was hit my a old lady on a moped" _I had to laugh, the image of Edward being hit by an old lady on a scooter was just too funny,

_"Luckily she wasn't going to fast, I only had a few bumps and bruises, but seeing myself bleed was pretty interesting" _

"I'll bet. Why did it take so long to come back?"

_"I wanted to make sure I was as back to as normal as I could be before I came back, and I was a bit unsure at how you would react so I put it off again and again, I guess I was scared" _

"I'm glad you came back, I was so confused when you left, I wondered how come you didn't love me anymore, what had I done to cause that, I always wondered where you had gone and whether you though of me or not, it was a long time before I could think of anything else, of course Jacob helped a lot"

_"I hope I'm not out of place in saying this, but I thought of you every moment of every day, what else do you think would drive me to the Volturi?" _

There was a knock at the door, it must have been Jacob, and just in time, this conversation was headed to dangerous territory,

"Hey, I have to head off, Jacob's here"

_"Of course, and Bella?"_

"Yeah"

_"Thank you again for forgiving me, and for deciding to stay my friend, I truly appreciate it, and you have my guarantee that I will abide by all your terms and conditions" _he let out a nervous chuckle,

"No problems, bye Edward"

_"Bye Bella, I'll see you at school tomorrow" _I heard him end the call and the dial tone rang in my ear, I put the phone down and heard Charlie open the door. I got up off the bed and stretched, I'd been on the phone longer than I'd thought, I was stiff.

"Bells, Jacob's here" Charlie called up the stairs,

"I'm coming" I headed down the stairs and saw Jacob standing in the hall waiting for me, he had changed out of his suit and was in his usual cutoffs and shirt, I gave him a chaste kiss on the cheek, Charlie was still standing next to him,

"Hey there"

"Hey yourself" I heard Charlie sigh,

"I'll leave you kids to it then, there still one period left"

Jacob moved from one foot to the other nervously, I grabbed his hand and lead him to the kitchen,

"What is it Jacob? you're all fidgety and nervous"

"I was just wondering if you had talked to Edward yet" he couldn't hide the sneer from his face as he said Edward's name,

"I was just on the phone to him actually, it went pretty well, he agreed to my terms, and he apologised for his behaviour the other night, and I will tell you what I told him, no matter your feelings towards each other, you cannot involve me in any stupid disputes you may have, I am Switzerland"

"Switzerland?"

"I am neutral, like Switzerland, in the war" he just looked at me blankly, "really Jacob, you should pay more attention in school"

"Right. Listen Bella it's going to take a while for me to get used to this, your not going to be hanging out with him all the time or anything right?"

"Jacob, I will be at school with him every day, but my time is mine to spend as I will, but don't fret, you are still my number one" I lent over and kissed him deeply, "so stop worrying"

"Sorry, I guess I'm kinda jealous, I'll work on it I promise" he looked so earnest that it was hard no to believe him. I let out a huge yawn and rubbed my eyes,

"You look tired, I should go so you can get some rest"

"But you just got here"

"You look like your about to pass out any second, and it would be selfish of me to keep you awake for my own selfish reasons, and I think Dad might need some company tonight, he took today pretty hard" he stood up from the table, pulling me up with him, he wrapped his arms around me, the warmth he generated made me even tireder,

"See ya Bells, get some rest okay?"

"I will" I yawned again as we stood by the door, "see you tomorrow?"

"Sure, I'll give you a call" he bent down and kissed my forehead then headed out into the misty night, it was freezing out there, but of course he couldn't feel it. I closed the door and went to the living room,

"Night Dad"

"Jacob gone already?, that was a quick visit"

"Yeah, I'm beat and I'm going to head to bed early, he felt bad keeping me awake"

"Okay, night Bells"

I headed up to my room and collapsed on the bed, I didn't even have the energy to brush my teeth or get under the covers, as soon as my head hit the pillow I fell into a deep contented sleep.

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**Well, there you have it, another chapter! Now all thats left is for you to review!! *begs* pleeaaasseee???? **

**Like I said at the start I have plotted out some storylines for quite a few more chapters so I'm going to try and stick with my plan to update every weekend. **

**Also I will be taking over another story from a friend of mine, so all you Supernatural fans keep an eye out, I plan to have it up in the next week or so! If you're imaptient, head over to Mssammydean's profile and check out what she has started, the story is called Gracie Alexander and I will be picking up from chapter 12.**

**Once again, please review!!  
**


	14. School

***hangs head in shame* I know it's been forever since I updated, and I feel bad about that, but I'm back! My husband had been working mostly day shifts so I don't have as much free time to work on it as I used to (priority's and all that) **

**School**

I woke to the sound of rain falling on the roof,

_no surprise there,_

I rolled over to check the time on my clock, it was ten minutes before my alarm was due to go off, I must have slept deeply because I couldn't remember waking at all, or having any dreams, which was strange for me, especially considering the events of late. I sat up on the edge of my bed, stretching my back and reaching my arms up above my head as far as I could, after hearing a satisfying pop from my shoulders I stood up, my legs also felt heavy, I lifted my left foot up behind me and grabbed it with my left hand, I wobbled one the one leg and nearly fell head first into my desk,

_remind to self: never try yoga_

I grabbed my toiletries bag and headed into the shower, my teeth felt all furry from not brushing the night before and my hair was like a haystack on top of my head, I stepped into the shower and let the hot water flow over my body washing away all sleepiness, I stepped out into the steam filled bathroom, and was cold again in an instant. I pulled on my jeans and normal long sleeved tee and hoodie, it was hard to be fashion conscious when you had to rug up so much. Going downstairs I tripped over my shoelace and landed on my hands and knees at the bottom,

_great start to the day_

Thinking about the coming day gave me nervous butterlies in my stomach, it took a second to realise why,

_Edward would be back at school today,_

After a quick breakfast of pop tarts and juice I grabbed my jacket and headed out into the wet morning, at least it would be warm in my truck. I drove carefully to school, the rain came down hard and my wipers had trouble keeping up, as I pulled into the school car park I noticed I was one of the first to arrive. I parked as close as possible to the walkway so I didn't have to run too far through the rain.

I found myself a seat in the main thoroughfare of the school while I waited for the classroom to open, a few students trickled by and after ten or so minutes the foot traffic got thicker, I turned up my mp3 player to drown out the sound of a hundred conversations and went back to flicking through my maths homework, I was sure I got some of the problems wrong, as I reworked one of my solutions a shadow fell over me and someone pulled out one of my earphones,

"Shouldn't you have done that last night?" looking up I was stunned by Edwards green eyes staring at me, his face wearing his usual crooked smile, I felt my stomach flip,

_Stop that. _

"I was just checking over my answers actually" I closed my book and put it back in my bag,

"I could have a look if you like, I remember that math isn't your strongest subject" he let out a little giggle, it irritated me,

"I am perfectly capable of finishing my own homework thank you very much" I slung my bag over my shoulder, but everything spilled out on the ground, I hadn't zipped it up properly,

"Dammit" infuriating me even more was Edward standing beside me chuckling,

"Here let me help you, or we'll be late to class" he squatted down beside me and began collecting my books and other belongings, begrudgingly I thanked him,

"No problem" laughter was still etched on his face, "Oh, don't forget your phone" he bent down again and retrieved my phone from under the bench, "Looks like you got some messages"

I looked at the screen on my phone, I had three unread messages,

_Strange_

Edward snapped me out of my thoughts,

"You coming to class Bella? or are you going to stand around all day staring at your phone?"

"I'll be there in a minute, I just want to check these messages"

"Okay, see you in there" he strode away, it was still strange to see him move, no longer fluid and graceful, he was almost clumsy. I opened my messages, I was surprised to see they were all from Jacob,

_Morning beautiful, hope you slept well, I'll be thinking of you all day. _

the second was much the same,

_You awake? didn't get a message back, have fun at school today, still thinking of you. _

I opened the last one, it seemed like Jacob was getting a little worried,

_You still haven't messaged back, what's going on? everything okay? don't forget I love you. Plz message back. _

I checked the times of the messages, they were all about 15 minutes apart, it wasn't like Jacob to message me this time of the day, let alone so many times, usually he would still be asleep unitl mid morning. I typed a quick message to appease Jacob,

_Sorry didn't notice messages, thinking of you too._

I made sure my phone was on silent as I walked into the classroom, Edward was sitting at the desk next to mine, his books already open, I'd never seen anyone so eager for class to start, it was unnerving. The class seemed to go on forever, I resisted every urge to look over at Edward, even though I could feel his eyes on me every few minutes, I pulled my hair over my shoulder to make a dark curtain, hopefully he wouldn't see the flush in my cheeks everytime I felt his stare. When the teacher finished handing out our latest assignments he went to the board and wrote,

POETRY

there was a collective sigh, it seemed like poetry wasn't very popular in Forks High. The teacher handed out some battered old books, I looked at the cover of mine, below the crude pictures scrawled on the front was the title,

.

_Blue Light, Clear Atoms _

The teacher held his book up,

"It's pretty obvious poetry is next in the agenda so if you could all open your books up to page 167, we are going to start with love poems"

There was another groan from the class, this one even louder than the first,

"I know, I know, you guys aren't happy about it, but it's in the curriculum so you're just going to have to suck it up, and just to please you further the first poem we are going to study is SOnnet 116 by Mr. William Shakespeare himself"

Edward leaned over towards me and whispered,

"I love this poem"

I looked over at him but he was already reading from the ratty book in front of him, the sound of the teachers voice drew my attention away from him,

"So I'll read it to you first then we'll have a discussion" he cleared his throat and began,

_"Let me not to the marriage of true mindes_

_Admit impediments, love is not love_

_Which alters when it altercation findes,_

_Or bends with the remover to remove._

_O no, it is an ever fixed marke_

_That lookes on tempests and is never shaken;_

_It is the star to every wandring barke,_

_Whose worths unknowne, although his higth be taken._

_Lov's not Times foole, though rosie lips and cheeks_

_Within his bending sickles compasse come,_

_Love alters not with his breefe houres and weekes,_

_But beares it out even to the edge of doom:_

_If this be error and upon me proved,_

_I never writ, nor no man ever loved." _

The classroom was silent, most of them with a glazed expression on their faces, some looked out the window, others up at the ceiling, it was clear that hardly anyone in the room understood Shakespeare,

"So, does anyone want to tell me roughly what Shakespeare was saying when he wrote this?"

Edward raised his hand,

"Mr. Cullen"

"Basically Shakespeare was saying that true love never changes, no matter what, it is always constant, it never fades, lasting eternity" I looked up from my book, Edward was looking straight at me, I felt the blush rise in my cheeks.

"Excellent Edward, now can anyone else tell me anything about this sonnet?"

There was silence,

"Okay, can anyone tell me about the rhythm of the poem, about it's basic makeup?"

I raised my hand,

"Miss Swan"

"It runs in iambic pentameter?"

"Correct, does everyone know what iambic pentameter means?"

Silence again, this time it was broken by the bell indicating the end of class,

"We'll continue this discussion next class, please re read this poem again before next class, I want you all to understand it" the teachers voice was drownerd out by the sound of chairs scraping across the floor.

"Ready for biology?" Edward asked standing next to me,

"Biology, right"

"Don't sound so excited"

"It's hard to get excited about school, don't know why you're so cheerful about it, it's not like you haven't done yout fair share of hard time"

"I'm just in a good mood today, I haven't had too much human interaction lately, it's energising"

He wore a cheesy grin on his face all the way to the biology lab, we paused to let me enter first and then followed me to our table, it was almost like old times. I got my books out of my bag and sat them in front of me, we were early for class, I decided to check my phone before the teacher turned up, I had five missed calls and eight messages,

_Gee, it's only been an hour, _I thought. Opening up my missed call log I noticed they were all from Jacob, my heart started to pound,

_It must be something serious, something must have happened _

I quickly checked my inbox to see if the messages revealed anything, they were all from Jacob too, five just to tell me I had missed calls from Jacob, the other three were text messages,

_Lets meet up after u finish school, do something together._

I opened the next one,

_I tried to call, you busy? want me to meet you at your place? _

this was not like laid back Jacob at all, I quickly moved to the last message,

_why are u ignoring me? I thought we were all okay now, is HE at school today? is that why you won't answer me? got someone better to spend your time with now?_

I hit the reply button, I wasn't sure whether to be mad or upset or both, I quickly typed out a message,

_I'm not ignoring you I have been in class, yes, he is at school today but it has nothing to do with you and I, I would love to spend this afternoon with you but if you are going to behave like this perhaps I should spend it with Edward instead. _

I hit send just as Mr Varner walked in,

"Put your phone away Miss Swan please we are here to learn not to socialise"

I felt my face get hot as I quickly put my phone in my bag, I heard Edward snicker quietly beside me, I flashed him a death stare, he stopped abruptly.

"Okay, today we are going to get organised for our next major assignment, I understand the break starts at the end of this week, but lucky for you guys, this assignment is to be done over the break and counts for about half of your grade for this year"

I felt the mood in the room head south, trust the teachers to try and ruin our break,

"Also it is to be done in pairs, whoever you are sitting next to is going to be your partner, so if you don't like who you are sitting next to, bad luck, looks like you'll be failing biology"

He walked up and down the aisles handing out folders, I opened up mine, it was full of forms and maps and diagrams, there were also phot's of a very familiar place, the tide pools at La Push.

"I have allocated the projects for each pair, I did this so no one ends up doing the same thing, there will be no arguing and I will not change any of the assignments, so look throught your folders and get started"

Edward pulled the folder towards him and started reading off the front page,

"Investigate the different life forms of the tidal pools, document any differences due to tide, time of day, water temperature and weather and any other elements that may influence them" he lifted his head,

"This sounds interesting"

"Yeah, whatever" my mind wandered to Jacob, why was he acting like this, wasn't it only last night he agreed to Edward and I being friends, and to not carry on like a jealous fool, it was only day one and already it was like he was keeping tabs on me, the more I thought about it the more it angered me, didn't he trust me?.

"Bella?" Edward waving his hands in front of my face snapped me out of my thoughts, "I was talking to you, were you even listening?"

"Sorry, I was daydreaming"

"I wanted to know when we can get a start on this? do you want to get in early and get it out of the way?"

"Sure, sounds good" I was completely distracted, he could ask me to sell him my liver and I would probably agree,

"This weekend okay then?"

"Yeah, sure"

"Bella, you're not listening to me are you?"

"Yeah sure that sounds great" he gave an exasperated sigh, it sounded like the old Edward I knew,

"BELLA" his raised voice made me jump, and everyone else in the classroom too, they all looked over at me, I felt my face go beetroot red,

"Glad to see I have your attention, now is this weekend okay with you to start our assignment?"

I tried to remember if I had any plans for the weekend, nothing came to mind, but I would definitely feel better if I ran the idea past Jacob first, with the mood he was in today I didn'think going home and telling him I was spending the weekend with Edward on the reservation would go down too well, that brought up another problem,

"But we have to go on the reservation, you won't be able to go" his brows furrowed, but then he smiled,

"There's no reason why I can't go on that reservation Bella, the treaty was only relevant when I was a vampire"

"Oh, right, well I'll have to check with Jacob to see if he had any plans first, but I'm sure it will be okay" he raised his eyebrows at me,

"Since when have you had to ask permission to do anything" I glared at him,

"Watch it Cullen, you're heading into no go territory there, and I don't have to ask his permission for anything, but don't you think it would be polite to let him know?"

"Sorry, of course, I was just teasing" the teacher was at the head of the class again,

"Does everyone understand the outlines? any questions?" no one raised their hands,

"Okay then, well that's it for today, for class tomorrow I would like to see some sort of schedule organised for each pair, see you all tomorrow"

There was a rush as everyone packed up there things and headed out to lunch,

"Can we have lunch together today?" his green eyes pleaded at me, I felt bad for him, now his family wasn't here I was the only friend he had, but I had other things I had to attend to,

"I'm sorry I have something I need to do, I'll be skipping lunch today" I wanted to go call Jacob and sort out whatever problem he had today,

"Oh sure, well, I'll see you later." he turned,

"Edward, I'll call you tonight, about making that schedule" he spun back around to smile at me, but it didn't touch his bright green eyes.

As we walked out the door, we headed in different directions, it made me feel guilty leaving him alone, but I had things to sort out. I headed out into the car park, the rain had died down, but here was still a soft drizzle falling, I jumped into the cab of my truck and rummaged through my bag for my phone. I dialled Jacob's number, it barely rang once before he answered,

_Bella, it's about time, why haven't you been answering?_

The tone in his voice surprised me, he sounded really mad,

"Jacob, I'm at school I can't just go answering my phone in the middle of class, what is it that's so important that you need to ring me a dozen times and send angry messages, I don't understand why you are so mad at me"

_I admit I might have been a little unreasonable, but all I can think about is that you are spending the day with him,_

I heard the snarl in his voice when he thought about Edward,

_I told you I would work on the jealousy thing, but it's hard okay._

"Well you need to try harder, we've been set a biology assignment and Edward is my partner, we have to work on it over the break, so we will be spending time together" I paused before adding, "

"we have to study the tidal pools on the reservation" there was silence on the other end of the phone,

"Jacob?"

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**You guys know I love a cliffy :D, hee hee I wonder what Jacob's reaction will be??? and the chapter was getting a little long, I want to try and keep them all around the same length, and it encourages me to update sooner! Also I'd like to apologise, when I sat down to write this chapter I wasn't really in the mood, but thinking about how long it had been since I updated I felt like I had to force it out, so it's not the best chapter, I almost considered scrapping it and starting again, but I persisted, and wouldn't you know it, now I'm in the mood to write again.**

**Now all that's left is to review!  
**


	15. Moody

**Well here is another chapter! Enjoy! **

**Moody**

"Jacob?" there was nothing but silence on the other end of the line, and it was starting to worry me,

"That bloodsucker is not setting one foot on this reservation" there was menace in his voice and I could nearly hear his body quiver and shake,

"Jacob, he's not a vampire anymore, there's no reason why he can't be on the reservation" I could tell he was grinding his teeth,

"Listen, this counts as a huge percentage of our grade for the year, so it's not like we have much of a choice, I'm doing the right thing by letting you know, we were thinking about going this weekend" his answer was short and swift,

"No"

"I wasn't asking for your permission"

"Bella" he sighed, it was funny how that sound made me feel so incredibly guilty, like _I _was in the wrong, like _I _was out to make his life miserable, I felt the sudden compulsion to try and make it up to him, even though I hadn't done anything,

"Jacob, I hate arguing with you, it's silly. I love _you _remember?, How about you come around to my place after I finish school and we'll do something fun this afternoon?"

"Sure, sounds good" he still sounded far from happy, but he was just going to have to suck it up, I'd already put up with a lot from him since Edwards return and I didn't think I could put up with much more,

"I need to go get something to eat before lunch ends or I'll end up passing out in gym or something"

"Okay, try not to hurt yourself, or anyone else for that matter" he chuckled, that was more like my Jacob,

"I'll try not to, see you this afternoon, love you"

"Love you too Bells, see ya" I threw my phone back into my bag and flipped up my hood ready for the dash across the car park, hopefully there was something decent left in the cafeteria for me to eat before I headed off to gym class.

I made sure that my truck was locked and headed towards the drab brick walls of the school as fast as was safe for me, I still managed to trip on the kerb, only just keeping myself upright. I made my way into the cafeteria, luckily there was no line, so I didn't have to wait, unluckily though it meant there was very little left to choose from, there was a small amount of macaroni cheese left, but it looked like it was more oil than actual macaroni cheese, there were also some dried up fries left or a sad looking salad sandwich, I picked up the sandwich and turned to look for my usual table of friends, there was an extra person seated at the end of the table where I usually sat, it was Edward, and it looked like he was having the time of his life, everyone was laughing at some joke, next to Edward sat Lauren she threw her head back and put her hand on his arm, watching this small action, I felt a pang of jealousy,

_Stop it right now Isabella Swan_

I took a deep breath and made myself move towards the table, the only seat left was opposite Lauren, I sat down and started to unwrap my forlorn sandwich, I heard Lauren clear her throat, it was obvious she was trying to get my attention,

"Bella, Edward was just telling us the funniest story, it's a shame you missed it" the look on her face said he wasn't sorry at all, I felt a sudden urge to wipe that smirk right off her face,

"Yeah, I'll bet it just was hilarious" Edward looked over at me, his brows furrowed, Lauren looked straight at me and put her hand on Edward's upper arm,

"It's so good to have you back Edward, it hasn't been the same without you around"

_You have GOT to be kidding me_

She never had the guts to speak to Edward when he was a vampire, she was like the rest of the student population, they were intimidated and slightly uncomfortable around the Cullen's, with good reason of course, but now she was talking like they used to be best friends, well two could play at that game, I turned to face Edward,

"I'm really looking forward to spending time together this weekend at the tide pools" out of the corner of my eye I saw Lauren stiffen, now it was my turn to smirk,

"Oh, are you guys are going to the reservation? does that mean your boyfriend will be there Bella?" I felt the blood drain from my face, fortunately the bell rang so I was spared having to think of a decent comeback, everyone started moving, pushing chairs back and grabbing school bags, Lauren stayed close to Edward, and glanced my way again,

"You mind if I walk with you to Spanish Edward?" he looked a bit uncomfortable,

"Um....no........that sounds......yeah" she sidled up beside him, a huge fake grin plastered over her smug face, eh turned away from her and faced me,

"You'll call me tonight to make arrangements for this weekend?" I could feel Lauren's gaze bore into me like knives,

"Yeah, of course, I'll talk to you tonight"

I watched them walk away, and mentally kicked myself, what the hell was I thinking, getting jealous over Lauren fawning over Edward, everyone had always fawned over him, it was nothing new, although the obvious flirting was definitely a new development, but I had no right to be jealous, Edward was no longer my boyfriend, I had a very caring and wonderful boyfriend of my own,

_But he hasn't been so wonderful lately _

I shouldn't have let her get to me like that, what sort of message was I sending to Edward behaving like that, and in the end it made me no better than Lauren herself when I engaged in such bitchy behavior, I threw the sandwich in the garbage bin on my way out, I had only taken one bite out of it, so much for eating something before gym.

As I walked into the gymnasium I noticed that the white board was still front and center, I breathed a sigh of relief, apparently we hadn't finished learning the theory of raquet ball yet, funny, you wouldn't think there would be that much to learn, you hit the ball with the raquet, that about summed it up for me. I sat at the back of the class, the teacher was less likely to call on me if I hid back there, I would be free to sit and think.

Gym class passed in the blink of an eye, I hadn't heard one word the teacher had said, I'd spent the whole lesson brooding on the fact that Jacob was mad at me and that I was mad at myself, I thought about how much I'd like to go back to last week, when everything was simple and clear and easy, no mad boyfriends, no gorgeous exes, no manipulative girls making me jealous, but of course everything had to go wrong, I guess some of us just get lucky. Not.

I walked out into the car park, thankfully the rain had stopped, but it was still bitterly cold, I wrapped my jacket tighter around myself and headed towards my truck, as I walked across the yard I saw Edward standing by his silver Volvo, Lauren was with him, I forced myself to look away,

_It's got nothing to do with you who he talks to _

As I put the keys in the door I couldn't help myself, I glanced around at them, she was chatting away, and he looked thoroughly disinterested, it made me feel a little better,

_Stop that_

I threw my bag in the cab with a little too much force, it smacked into the passengers side door with a resounding thud, better get this out of my system before I head home to see Jacob. The truck started with a roar, I didn't even notice if anymore if people looked when my truck rumbled to life, I pulled out of the car park and drove the short distance to home, as usual because I wanted everything to slow down it seemed to move faster,

_Typical_

Jacob's rabbit was already parked outside the house, and I could see him sitting on the front step, that was strange, usually when Charlie wasn't home he would let himself in with the key from under the eave, his arms were twisted behind his back like he was hiding something. I turned off the engine, everything was suddenly quiet, Jacob stood and walked over and opened my door for me, his behavior was starting to freak me out,

"Hey Bells" he leaned down and kissed me, his arms still held behind his back,

"Hey yourself" he had a goofy smile on his face,

"I got something for you" he pulled his hands out from behind his back, in them he held a bunch of freesias, they were a beautiful off white colour and the smell coming off them was amazing,

"Wow, Jake, I'm stunned, what did I do to deserve these" this was the first time he had ever brought me flowers,

"Can't your boyfriend buy you flowers just because he loves you?"

"Of course, but you never had before" he nodded his head,

"I know, and that's a serious error on my part" he looked down at his feet,

"Actually I did buy these for a reason, I felt bad about how I've been behaving lately, I wanted to make it up to you, I've got stuff for a picnic too" he pointed over at the front porch, I now noticed a wicker basket and tartan rug sitting near the door, I was temporarily speechless,

"So, you like?"

"Um, of course I like, I'm so surprised, it's so sweet" I looked up at his face and couldn't help but smile,

"So, where are we going for this romantic picnic?" he looked at me sheepishly,

"Well it took some time trying to organise all the food and stuff so I didn't really get a chance to think of anywhere to go, so I think the backyard is going to have to do, I hope you don't mind?" I laughed,

"Of course I don't mind, you went to all this trouble, no matter where we are it's going to be lovely" he grabbed my hand and lead me towards the porch, his skin hot against mine.

We grabbed climbed the steps hand in hand, I unlocked the door with the spare key and sat my bag just inside the door and headed to the kitchen to put my flowers in some water, I rushed back outside and relocked the door, Jacob hung the blanket over his right arm and grabbed the basket with his left, he motioned back towards the steps,

"After you"

We headed around the back and towards the tree line, it had stopped raining but the ground was still wet, I looked over at the blanket, I wasn't sure whether it would be thick enough to protect us from the cold, wet ground. Jacob sat the basket down on the ground and started unfolding the blanket, I noticed it was one of those heavy duty rubber backed ones, that eased my apprehension of sitting on the ground, he laid it out flat and sat the basket on the corner,

"Seat Mademoiselle?" his french pronunciation was terrible,

"Don't mind if I do"

I sat down cross legged beside the basket, I went to lift the lid, Jacob slapped my hand away gently,

"No you don't, it's a surprise" he seated himself opposite me and reached over and pulled the basket to himself, he opened it up and began to lay everything out, first the paper plates and cups, then he pulled out a white box, the kind you got from bakery stores,

"Ooo, what's in there?

"I hope you like cupcakes" I rolled my eyes at him,

"Who doesn't like cupcakes?" he placed a cupcake on each of our plates, they had chocolate icing and were decorated with sugar flowers, they looked delicious, and I was suddenly ravenous, my stomach grumbled loudly, Jacob chuckled,

"Good thing I brought extras, sounds like you might need them" I blushed,

"Yeah, I didn't end up getting any lunch" he placed a second cupcake on my plate, this one had vanilla icing, he reached into the basket again and brought out a bottle of orange juice, he poured us both a drink, and put the bottle back into the basket, he raised his glass towards me, I picked mine up and touched it against his,

"To us" his face broke into a huge smile, at the same time the sun broke through the clouds and shined down on our little picnic,

"To us"

We ate our cupcakes in silence, the only sound was the birds from the woods behind us, I licked a blob of icing off my finger and looked over at Jacob, his russet skin nearly glowed in the sunlight, his hair was sleek and shiny, even with the slightest movement his muscles rippled underneath his shirt, he was an amazing creature to behold,

"Jacob, this is really beautiful, I really appreciate it" he sat the remains of his cupcake back on the plate and reached over to lightly brush my face with his fingertips,

"You're beautiful" blood rushed up to my face again, showing my embarrassment,

"I'm so sorry about the way I've been behaving lately, I feel really bad" I pulled his hand off my face and wrapped both my hands around it, they barely covered it,

"I understand it's been hard for you to understand and accept, but there is no one in this world that I would rather be with right now"

"I know, I feel the same way, I think that's why I've been so difficult, I couldn't bear to lose you"

"You're not going to lose me"

"I know, but when he showed up again, it just scared me what might happen, and now you have to spend more time with him, it just makes me feel pretty insecure" I could tell these things were hard for him to say,

"It's school work Jacob, we're going to be working, and hopefully we can get it finished pretty quickly so I can spend the rest of break with you" he stacked our plates to the side and moved closer to me,

"Sounds like a good plan to me" he leaned over and pressed his lips to mine gently, I felt my heart quicken like it always did when he kissed me, I leaned in closer to him, it was starting to get seriously cold and cuddling up to Jaocb was a sure fire way to keep from freezing, he must have felt me shiver,

"I better get you inside, you must be freezing" he moved away and started packing everything away back inside the basket, he stood up and held his hand out to pull me up, my legs had gone all tingly from sitting cross legged for so long, I stumbled when he let go of my hand, Jacob grabbed my arm as I lurched towards him, he laughed,

"Bella, what would you do if I wasn't here to save you all the time?" I shrugged,

"Fall over a lot more than I already do?" he rolled his eyes at me and let go of my arm, collecting the basket and blanket off the lawn,

It was much warmer inside, and as soon as I stepped into the kitchen I could smell the freesias sitting on the table, looking at them all I could do was smile, Jacob must have been watching me,

"I'm going to buy you flowers more often if they are going to make you smile like that, it's cute" once again I blushed, I don't take compliments well,

"So what time do you think Charlie's going to be home?" he moved closer to me, trapping myself between his body and the bench,

"Late, he said he had a lot of paper work to catch up on" I laid my hands on his chest, he lowered his face level to mine,

"Really?" I was finding it hard to focus,

"Uh huh, I guess we'll just have to try and find something to do to fill in the time" he moved his hands up to cup my face, his skin burning hot on mine,

"Hmmm, what to do" he moved in closer and ran his lips lightly across mine, then moved down my jaw towards my neck, I tilted my head and moaned, I felt one of his hands move around to the back of my neck, as I enjoyed the sensation of his lips on my skin the phone rang,

"Dammit" I said, Jacob's lips moved up to my ear and he mumbled,

"Leave it" but I couldn't, it could be important, I wrestled my way out from behind Jacob and picked up the phone, trying not to sound breathless,

"Hello"

"Bella, hi, it's Edward"

"Edward, I wasn't expecting you to call" I looked over to Jacob, his fists were balled at his sides and the look on his face said it all.

"I just called to organise what we're going to do this weekend"

"Oh, right, I thought I was going to call you" I saw Jacob start to tremble slightly as I said this, he sighed loudly and stormed off out of the kitchen, I heard the front door slam,

"Um, Edward this isn't really a good time right now, I have to go"

"Bella?" he sounded worried,

"Bye" I hung up the phone and ran to the door, as I stepped over the threshold I just glimpsed a large russet coloured wolf disappear into the trees.

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**I felt bad for making Jacob out to be some incredibly horrible guy so I thought I might give him a fighting chance, I mean if he's going to act like an ass _all_ the time of course Bella is going to run back to Edward, but then that would take all the fun out of it :) **

**And once again big thanks to my reader Zephyr Girl 77, she suggested having Edward receive some attention from the opposite sex, hope you liked it, and I swear I'm going to have to put you down as a co author soon, you give me great ideas! **

**So please review people! xxx  
**


	16. Explanation

**My humblest apologies for not updating sooner, I'll explain all after the chapter, you've waited a while for it so I better not keep you all any longer :P **

**As usual I don't own anything :(  
**

**Explanation **

I raced back into the kitchen and grabbed my keys off the counter, I'll be damned if I was going to let Jacob keep carrying on like this, how could he blow so hot and cold all the time, he was getting upset over nothing, and if I was going to have to keep reassuring him all time, I was going to lose patience quickly.

The engine started with a roar as always and I reversed down the driveway too fast, nearly collecting Charlie's cruiser on the way out, he beeped his horn and called out the window,

"Where's the fire?" I wound my window down half way and called back, I had to yell to be heard over the engine,

"I have to go down to La Push, I don't know what time I'll be back, there are leftovers in the fridge from last night" I probably sounded panicky, because I sure as hell felt it, and the look on my dad's face said that this fact hadn't escaped him, he looked concerned,

"Okay, just drive a bit more careful okay"

"Sure, sure" I wound the window back up to protect against the mist sneaking it's way inside the cab of my truck.

I could hear the engine protest as I pushed it to it's limits along the deserted highway, I thought it would be highly unlikely for Jacob to go straight home, but if he wasn't there I knew I would be able to find someone who would be able to locate him for me.

I pulled up outside the small red house, I saw Billy pull back the curtains after obviously hearing my arrival, I didn't like the look on his face. Cutting the engine I climbed out of the warm cab, instantly regretting the fact that in my rush I had neglected to grab my jacket.

As I strode towards the house it struck me that I hadn't really thought this through, yes, I was mad, yes, Jacob was being a douche, but I had to remember that he _was_ a werewolf, while I didn't think he would ever actually hurt me, if I wasn't careful about how I approached him who knows how he could react, as much as I wanted to yell and rant and rave and slap him right now, it wouldn't be the smartest idea, Emily's scarred face swam to the forefront of my mind, no, it wouldn't be a smart idea at all.

I knocked once on the door and let myself in, this was my second home and I knew Billy wouldn't mind, so it surprised me that he was waiting just inside the door,

"Jake's not here Bella" he was short and sharp, I was taken aback,

"Umm, okay do you know where he is?"

"He said he was going to see Sam to see of he could run patrol tonight, I'm sure he's busy, you should head home and leave him to it" it was unlike Billy to this rude,

"Well, I think it's pretty important that I speak to him actually, I'll head over there and see where he might be" I turned to head back out the door,

"Bella, don't you think he has enough to worry about without you carrying on with your Vampire"

"Excuse me?"

"The pack have been catching scents of vampires hanging aroung the edges of Forks, they have all been running extra patrols, he should be worrying about protecting the tribe but instead his mind is always on you and that bloodsucker"

"I didn't know that there were any vampires around, Jacob never told me that" the news of vampires around Forks had me on edge,

"Jacob didn't tell you?" Billy looked surprised,

"No he didn't"

"Oh, I thought he would have" he paused "especially considering"

"Considering what?"

"Well, it looks like the Cullens are back, well, at least some of them anyway"

"The Cullens? I don't understand"

"A few days ago the pack caught scent of two of the Cullens just outside of Forks, they had to haul ass back to the reservation so as not to break the treaty"

"Only two?"

"Yeah, not the leader, the other two males"

"Emmett and Jasper"

"Whatever their names are they're back, so the pack have been running extra patrols just in case"

"Emmett and Jasper aren't dangerous, the shouldn't be worried"

"Jasper, isn't he the one who took a snap at you on your birthday?" images of that night flashed through my head, Jasper's wild black eyes, the glittering of the shattered crystal, the look of depair in Edwards eye's,

"Yeah"

"Doesn't sound too safe to me"

"So that's why Jacob has been so stressed lately, I though he was just overeacting about Edward being back"

"Can you blame him about being upset about Edward being back? all of a sudden his girlfriend wants to spend time with her ex, who of course is no longer a danger to be around and the whole pack is worried about the Cullens being back, their being here has always attracted others of their kind" I wasn't really listening to Billy, I was lost in my own thoughts,

"I wonder why he didn't tell me? and Edward didn't tell me either"

"If you knew they were back what would you do?"

"Most likely go and visit them"

"Exactly. Do you think Jacob wants to see you hanging around with his mortal enemies?"

"No, I guess not"

"Perhaps you won't go and rip his head off now like it looked like you were going to?" I felt a little sheepish, maybe I wasn't looking at this from Jacob's point of view,

"I promise I won't rip his head off"

"Glad to hear it" I gave Billy a small grin and turned to walk out the door,

"Bella, don't be too hard on him, he's all tied up in knots worrying about you and Edward and still trying to do as much as he can for the pack"

"I'm sorry I've made things difficult for him, and I know he is trying, but he's been acting like an idiot lately, we just need to get things sorted once and for all" I stepped over the threshold and back out into the gloom, I heard Billy push the door closed behind me.

I had came to La Push ready to rip Jacob a new one and now I was feeling guilty and selfish, I was more worried how I was feeling and not worried about what he may be going through, as I climbed in to my truck I felt like slapping myself, it was easy to forget that he had this other life as well, he was a protector of his tribe, I could only imagine the sort of responsibilities and pressures that were on his shoulders, and I wasn't making it any easier for him.

I drove slowly down the main road of La Push towards Sam and Emily's house thinking of what I wanted to say to Jacob, at the top of the list was 'I love you'.

Pulling up in front of the little grey house I felt apprehensive, would Jacob even want to see me right now? I took a deep breath,

_"here goes" _I though to myself. Turning off the engine I was surprised to hear loud music blaring from the house, I could also hear someone singing at the top of their lungs, badly.

I knocked on the faded blue door and waited for an answer, nothing, they mustn't have been able to hear me over the racket going on inside, good thing Sam and Emily had no close neighbours, the noise was horrendous, it was so loud even the little yellow window box was shaking. I turned the handle and let myself in, instantly my ears were assaulted,

_"It's the eye of the tiger_

_It's the thrill of the fight_

_Rising up to the challenge of our rival_

_And the last known survivor_

_Stalks his prey in the night_

_And he's watching us all_

_With the eye of the tiger"_

Walking into the tiny living room I realised quickly what was going on, Embry and Jared were standing in front of the TV, microphones in hand playing singstar, they had the volume turned up as loud as it could go and were singing at the top of their lungs, Sam was sitting in the arm chair looking at them as if they were insane, he looked up and waved, the boys were still oblivious to me and kept singing,

_"Risin' up, straight to the top_

_Had the guts, got the glory_

_Went the distance, now I'm not gonna stop_

_Just a man and his will to survive_

_It's the eye of the tiger_

_It's the thrill of the fight_

_Rising up to the challenge of our rival_

_And the last known survivor_

_Stalks his prey in the night_

_And he's watching us all_

_With the eye of the tiger"_

As I watched them battle it out I noticed that 'Awful' kept coming up on their scores, I wasn't surprised, they sounded like a couple of tone deaf gorillas. Thankfully it was now quiet, except for a weird ringing in my ears,

"Hey Bella" Sam said, Embry and Paul turned around,

"BELLA!"

"Bells!"

"Hey, you guys practising for the next Idol auditions or something" Embry laughed and replied,

"Emily bought this the other day, it's soooo cool! How awesome did we sound?" Jared punched him in the arm,

"Suck it Embry, I kicked your ass!"

"Dude, you beat me by 50 points, that is _not _kicking my ass" I raised my eyebrows at them,

"Well according to those scores you're both tone deaf anyway" Sam laughed,

"A truer word never spoken Bella, what brings you here?"

"Actually I was looking for Jacob"

"Of course you are, but I sent him out on patrol for a while"

"Can you call him back I really need to talk to him"

"Actually I think it's better if I leave him out there for a while, let him calm down a bit, he wasn't in the greatest mood when he got here"

"Yeah, well, that's kinda my fault, it's why I want to talk to him so badly"

Embry and Jared turned the TV off and put the microphones on the coffee table,

"We're just going to head down to the store to get..." Jared looked at Embry,

"Something to eat" It was obvious they were just giving Sam and I some privacy, he gestured at the couch,

"Have a seat Bella"

"Listen Sam, I'm not in the mood for a lecture. Yes I know that it's my fault that Jacob has been so moody lately, yes I know that the other Cullens are back and he should be focusing on protecting the tribe, I already feel guilty enough okay" I slumped down on the couch and put my head in my hands,

"I wasn't going to lecture you Bella, I think there's a bit more going on in Jacobs head than you realise" I lifted my head and looked at him,

"What are you talking about?"

"You know about the mind connection while we're in wolf form right?"

"Of course you can hear one anothers thoughts"

"Well it's a bit more than that really, every single facet of our minds are joined, it's not only thoughts that we share, we can also feel what the others are feeling, emotionally and physically sometimes too"

"I didn't realise that"

"Yeah, of course it's very handy at times, but mostly it's downright uncomfortable being in someones head like that"

"I'll bet"

"I'm sure Jacob wouldn't want me talking to you about this stuff but I think you need to know exactly how he's feeling"

"Jealous? he has no reason to be jealous"

"Of course he's jealous, any normal man would be, but there's more than that, I'm not sure if this is the right way to put it but he kind of feels like a failure"

"A failure?" I tried to think of ways things that would make Jacob feel this way, but nothing came to mind,

"Maybe that's not the best way to describe it, he's disappointed in himself"

"Why?"

"Well, like I said a second ago, all members of the pack can feel what the others are feeling, when we transform, Jacob can feel what I feel and vice versa, the thing that gets to him most is the way I feel about Emily, in a way he knows what it feels like to be imprinted on someone, even though it hasn't happened to him, and it gets to him that he doesn't feel that way with you"

"He doesn't love me?"

"No, no, you misunderstand me, he loves you very much, more than you cold possibly imagine, but when you imprint it's like adding another whole level of devotion, a feeling like your entire universe is held by that one point, that one person, it's hard to explain to someone who hasn't imprinted"

"But why would it upset Jacob, not everyone imprints right?"

"No they don't, but a large percentage of this pack has, Jacob can see himself spending the rest of his life with you, but he worries because he hasn't imprinted on you whether you _are _the person he is _supposed_ to spend the rest of his life with. When you imprint on someone or are imprinted upon there is nothing in existence that can separate you, you're bonded for life, as much as you love each other, you two don't have that, if he was to upset you you could just walk away, or if you went to far with your ex bloodsucker, I'm sure he could walk away, and thinking like that pains him, and another thing haunts him as well, what if he does see someone one else out of the blue and imprints, he doesn't ever want to hurt you, he's seen what happened between Leah, Emily and I and it scares him" I looked down at my hands,

"That's why he's been so moody lately"

"Yeah, it's always been on the back of his mind, but with Edward coming back, it made it a whole lot worse" Sam grinned,

"He's going to want to kill me now for telling you this"

"I'm sure he'll get over it"

"Bella, don't beat yourself up over this, I'm sure you guys will sort everything out. Listen, Jacob is only running a quick couple of loops around the rez, as soon as he comes back I promise I'll send him over to your place, sound okay?"

"Yeah, that would be great, thanks Sam, for everything" as I stood I felt my joints creak, I hadn't moved a muscle while Sam had been talking,

"Anytime Bella, I consider you one of the family"

"That means a lot, thanks, I'll see you around"

"Sure thing" I walked outside and was surprised to find that it was almost dusk, and a lot colder, once again I cursed the fact that I didn't have a jacket with me.

The drive home was quiet, well, except for the normal roar of my truck, there didn't seem to be another soul on the roads. I drove thought the quit streets of Forks on the way towards my house, as I pulled into the drive I noticed Charlie's cruiser was gone, he'd probably gone to the cafe for dinner.

Once inside and warm again I checked the clock and wondered how long it would be before Jacob returned.

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**Once again I apologise for the delay in updating, I've had the mother of all cases of writers block, I tried to force myself to sit down and write but everything that came out of my head was absolute rubbish, I;d rather make you wait than subject you to that :) **

**I was talking to a friend about it not long ago, about how I can have periods where everything just flows and then other times I have mental constipation, she's an artist and told me that she has found that she does her best work when things are not going so well in her life, her art is sort of a form of escapism, she said she pretty must destroys any work she does when everything is rosy and she is happy, I thought about it and came to realise I seemed to have the same deal, when something in my life is not going right I escape into my little fantasy worlds but when things are good I can't seem to get there. So this might get updated a bit in the coming months, I have some major stuff going down at work and definantly need an outlet :).**

**Also my apologies to Team Edward and Team Jacob, I know they weren't present physically in this chapter, but believe me when I say they were there in spirit :P **

**All that's left to say is PLEASE REVIEW!!!!  
**


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